The air smells like brine and kelp, and the only sound is the shush of the waves as they break and vanish into the stones.
Even though it’s teetering on freezing, I want so desperately to sprint towards the water and dive straight in.
I hear the rocks crunch beside me, and am instantly comforted by Tek’s presence. He digs his hands into his pockets, but the sulking is gone. I watch as he shifts his gaze from the water, to the cliffs, then up at the sky.
Even though I’m the one who planned this, I’m just as awed as Tek is by the beauty and the silence. It’s not only the contrast after so much engine noise and incidental music, or the emptiness of the place. It’s a perfect, impossible kind of quiet that I’ve never felt anywhere else. Not even when I was a kid and would sneak out to surf before school, back when I’d talk to the waves. No. This is different. Here, it’s like if I address them directly, they might actually answer me back.
“You wanna check it out?” I ask Tek, nodding towards the ocean.
He shrugs, and we make our way across the slippery stones, skidding down a stretch where the tide has swept them clean.
“How did you find this place?” he asks when we’re close enough that the sea spray hits our faces.
“I have my ways.”
I move closer until the water is only an inch away from reaching my shoes.
I breathe the misty ocean air like it’s my life force.
I glance over my shoulder and see that Tek hasn’t followed me. He’s standing back, just watching me but pretending he isn’t.
“It’ll start getting dark soon… What do you feel like for dinner? Hot dogs, or…”
“Fine.”
I tilt my head to the side. “Fine?”
“I mean, I don’t care. I’m happy with whatever.” He gives me a little smile, then instantly turns away. I do the same and stare back out at the waves.
I hope he can relax out here.
I hope he can see I’m only trying to help.
And I hope that being this secluded, this far withdrawn from Broadrock and everyone in it, that he’ll bring down some of his walls.
It’s almost completely pitch black out here.
You’d think with all the stars you would be able to see clearly, but the moon is such a thin slither that anything outside the light of fire may as well be a mystery. The beach is like a slow metronome in the background, the waves breaking every few seconds with a soft hiss into the rocks. Every now and then there is a rustle through the branches, reminding us of how close we are to the tree line we can’t see.
I’m wearing two pairs of socks, a full sweat suit, and a ski jacket. I’m not cold this close to the fire, but I warm my hands against the flames anyway.
The ocean air has already started to tighten my skin, and every time I lick my lips they taste like salt—like exactly how I imagine Carey tastes.
On the other side of the fire Carey’s crouched down toasting a marshmallow, wrapped up in one of those vintage surf brand hoodies with the repeating patterns on a black polar fleecebackground, with his brother's plaid jacket over it. It’s hard to think about him separate from that damn jacket. I hated it, at first, how much it reminded me of Eden and the constant guilt that came along with it. But now, every time I see it hanging up in the break room I have to resist the urge to smell it, or to put it on myself and imagine Carey with his arms around me.
We’ve been drinking for a few hours now. Ever since the sun set, really. But even so, neither of us are drunk. He’s just smiling more than usual, which is a lot.
Actually, he’s fucking glowing.
He positions himself so he's holding the marshmallow stick between his knees, and grabs another two cans. “Shotgun race?”
I take the can from him. “I don’t do party tricks.”
He rolls his eyes and pulls a face that my comment deserves, because why is shutting down everyone else’s fun my default setting?
Grabbing the stick again, he cracks his can with one hand and only gets a single sip down before the marshmallow starts melting off the end. Without thinking, he pulls it close and opens his mouth only to drop the stick and flap his hand like an idiot because he burnt his tongue.
I sigh. “You’re ridiculous.”
