“What?”
“Call me Mad, Matilde. I could call you Mat. We should have our own thing, shouldn’t we? We’re twins.” She gives me a playful grin that lifts my spirits, and I agree.
The cemetery is old, and there’s an air of neglect hanging around it on this gray day in early December. We push through the rusty gates and tread across the brown grass to the far corner where a plain markeron the ground lists her dates of birth and death. “Her name is missing?”
“No, it’s at the top. The weeds have overtaken it.” I drop to my knees, pulling at them like I’m driven by a motor even as the sadness threatens to overtake me. Maddalena joins me, her shoulder touching mine. “I haven’t been here lately. School and work,” she explains, guiltily.
“She lives in your heart, and that is what matters.”
She smiles at my words, though I’m not sure they bring us comfort, and I can’t help feeling jealous that my sister has memories of our mother to cherish while I have only questions of what might have been. Of course, it is the same for her when it comes to our father.
“I wish I had flowers to offer. The nicest thing I own is this bracelet.” I cannot bear the thought of giving it away.
“No, you can’t leave that,” Maddalena agrees. “Someone would only steal it. It’s yours. I like the fairy.”
“She’s a wood nymph. No wings, you see. There was a book our father gave me when I was small. He would read it every night.”
“I’d like to read it, too,” Maddalena hints.
“We might find it at the library. Though I do not know where the closest library is.”
“I do. Come on. We have the whole afternoon together.”
Standing again, I hug her tightly, so happy to have found her. Home and family, my dearest wish, I have one of those things at last.
After we find a collection of fairytales that contains the story at the library, we make plans to meet as soon as we can. “I can’t skip school again when final exams are very close. I want to finish.”
“Of course. What about Saturday night?”
Considering it, I brighten when I recall that Nico and the children have dinner plans with his parents. “That would work.”
“Great. We should celebrate your upcoming graduation, our birthdays and finding each other in real style.”
“Style,” I repeat, liking how grown-up that sounds. “Yes, we should.”
16
Matilde
On Friday night, I’m a bundle of nerves thinking about tomorrow and praying Nico won’t find out about me skipping school. I’m only defying his orders in order to see my sister. So why am I plagued by strange fantasies about him catching me?
A cry in the dark drags me from my bed, and I beat Nico to the nursery this time. I’m changing Amadeo’s diaper when he enters, still dressed in his three-piece suit. It’s the first time I’ve ever seen him so rumpled and creased, and his tie is askew.
When he paces into the room, something dark lurks behind those gray eyes. He notes his t-shirt I wore to bed with obvious admiration. Most of my legs are exposed, and he doesn’t bother hiding his perusal of them.
A warning whispers ‘Run,’ but monsters love to chase, don’t they?
And girls can enjoy being devoured now and then,a more devious voice whispers in my mind.
“I have him if you want to get some rest,” I offer. Nico doesn’t speak. While I’m distracted looking at him, Amadeo decides he’s not finished peeing.“Merda,”I mutter, looking down at the wet spot on my shirt.
“Get another one from my bedroom.”
“I have pajamas.”
“You’ll get another one of my shirts, Matilde.” A delicious shudder races down my spine from his gruff command.
After my nod, he removes his suit jacket, vest and tie, crossing the room to look at his daughter sleeping peacefully. He undoes his cufflinks as I carry Amadeo to the rocking chair to soothe. Rolling up his sleeves, he reveals those powerful forearms. Why is my mouth suddenly dry?
