CHAPTER 22
ABEL
I sendAnya my daily text. If that’s all it takes to keep her and my parents away, I’ll make sure I have my alarm set three times over just so I don’t forget to send it. It’s been a week since I’ve been to Buckle’s house. A week since my first kisses. I still feel the whisper of their lips on mine every time I think about it.
We haven’t been able to meet all three of us again since that night. Either Buckle has overtime or I have meetings for the Valentine’s Day events or Perry has inventory or a sick employee he has to step in and work for. We’re constantly texting, though. I miss them, but I know we’ll see each other soon. We’re still trying to figure out our dynamic and that’s fine. It might take us a while.
I start an audiobook on yet another shifter town. I’m sure one of these days something will click and I’ll understand why Hawk Ridge is so different. I’m tempted to ask Anya for a copy of Hawk Ridge’s bylaws, but I don’t want her to know what I’m doing.Ibarely know what I’m doing, but there has to be a way besides getting a mage involved. I don’t want to be Kettle heir. I don’t want to leave Mink Hollow if I can help it. But I know deep in mygut, my parents or Anya will come for me. Perhaps I should let Buckle and Perry bond me with them.
I work on a tentacle for one of my octopus stuffies. It’s my favorite part of creating these toys. I plan to finish this octopus before moving on to other smaller toys for variety. I’m hoping to have a few done today to build my inventory. There’s not much time left before the festivities.
Mate Chat
Buckle: I’m looking forward to tonight <3
Perry: me too!
I put my work in my lap.
Abel: Same. And I’d like to do more kissing.
Buckle: Whatever you want, babe :)
Perry: wanna try other stuff?
My stomach clenches and I have to calm myself before I respond. Kissing is nice. But am I ready for more?
Abel: Let’s see how the night goes? If that’s okay?
Perry: of course ::kisses::
I keep thinking about asking them if they’ve had sex yet. I wish they would. I don’t want them to hold out because of me. Who knowswhenI’ll be ready?
I toss my phone to the couch and slump in the chair. I swear my heart pounds like a baby bird getting tossed from the nest for the first time when they’re learning to fly.
I nibble my bottom lip and start back on the octopus.
“You’re going to make someone so happy,” I say to my creation. Usually, I talk as I craft to make myself feel better.
The audiobook continues on from the couch where I tossed my phone. “Betas are a vital part of Hightop Cove. They’re especially needed in management to keep Alphas and Omegas calm.”
I scoff. “I can’t even help calm my mates. I’m useless. In fact, they have to calm me down.”
“—Betas have the ability to think clearer because they don’t have to worry about their pheromones affecting others since they have none.”
“Think clearer? I can’t think when the room is filled with pheromones. I fucking pass out.”
“Hightop Cove requires a balance of all designations. Without it, everyone isn’t represented. We urge all towns to require this balance. A balance of Alphas, Betas, and Omegas really brings out the best of our town. No one designation is wholly in charge and it makes for peaceful living.”
I have to wonder how old the recording is. A balance would make sense in Hawk Ridge. I chose the book on Hightop Cove because it was another avian run shifter community, but Hightop doesn’t seem to run on fear like Hawk Ridge.
“—Vital that everyone feels heard.”
“Ain’t that the truth,” I mutter. “But my mates make me feel seen and heard. They won’t make me do anything I don’t want to. Whether it’s sex or whatever. I know that. So why the fuck am I so scared of disappointing them?”
I put my octopus down again and stare at the wall.
I have two mates. Two. And while we’ve only just started to know each other, I adore them and I know they adore me. There’s still doubt in my head, but I try to push it away. We have rules in place for a reason. If I told them I had doubts, I know they’ll help soothe them away.
