“Sweetness, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing, just embarrassed yet again.”
Perry takes a tentative step towards me. “Where you shamed about sex at Hawk Ridge?”
“Shamed?” I bark a laugh and cut it off. “At Hawk Ridge, sex is only for bonded pairs. You’re not even supposed to masturbate.” I whisper the last word. “To pleasure yourself out of being bonded is punishable. Public humiliation.”
“Fuck Hawk Ridge. You know none of that happens in Mink Hollow, right?”
“I know, but it’s hard to break old fears like that. I had a wet dream once, and I was forced to walk all morning with a poster that said as such.”
Buckle growls. “You were a boy.”
I wrap my arms around myself. “Yes. And that was before my designation appeared. I’m trying to pull apart all the strings wrapped around me. But it’s hard. So hard.”
“You have us now, sweetness.” Perry digs his phone from his pocket. “We need each other’s numbers, then I’m starting a group chat. If there’s anything you need to talk about, text the group. I don’t care what it’s about or what time. Text us.”
Buckle nods, apparently too upset for speech.
We pass our phones around and my hands shake so badly I almost drop Perry’s phone.
“I... Idoknow sex and pleasure aren’t anything to be ashamed of. But I all those lessons are so hard to let go of.”
“We can help. When you’re ready,” Buckle says. He reaches out to cup my cheek. His thumb ghosts over my mouth briefly. My heart flutters. I want him to kiss me, but not yet. I’m not ready for either of them.
“Thank you for the food. And the cuddle pile.” I drop my gaze to the floor and blanch at the gray stain I’d forgotten about. I suck in a breath. “Wait!”
They both give me a soft grin.
“This was a date!”
“It was,” Buckle says. “At least I considered it one.”
“Me too,” Perry says.
“It was amazing.”
“I consider tonight a date too,” Perry says. “I’m... Okay.” He eyes Buckle. “You won’t fit in my car, so you’re picking us up and I’ll tell you where to go from there.”
We exchange addresses.
“I’ll be at your place at 6pm sharp,” Buckle says to Perry.
“Then we’ll pick up our sweet Beta.”
I chew on my bottom lip and nod. “I look forward to it.” I bounce on my toes. How had I not realized this was a date?
“I love that we’re leaving you happier than we found you,” Perry says.
Heat spreads across my cheeks.
“Shit,” Buckle says and I flinch.
“Abel?” Perry asks. “What is it about that word? Fuck doesn’t bother you, but that one does.”
“Papa always told me I was a shit after my designation became clear. Sometimes he’d slap me. Sometimes?—”
“I’m so sorry.” Perry steps close and I fall into his open arms. “You’re amazing, sweetness.”
Buckle wraps us both in his arms. Their pheromones lull me into a calmer headspace.
“I really like that.” My eyes get droopy, and Perry laughs as he holds me up.
“Oh, sweetness, we’ll smother you in happy lovey pheromones as much as you want.” He kisses the top of my head. “But you and Buckle need to clock back in now.”
Buckle kisses the top of my head, too. “I’ve loved every second of being together.”
“Same,” I whisper. “Same.”
