My shoulders hit the wall hard enough to knock the breath out of me. I gasped and he kissed me deeper, tilting my head back. I grabbed fistfuls of his shirt and pulled him against me because he still wasn't close enough.
His hands moved down to my waist, my hips, then lower. He caught the hem of my dress and pulled it up, the fabric bunching around my thighs. One hand pressed against my leg, his palm warm, his fingers spreading as they moved higher. Slow. Way too slow.
"Sebastian," I managed to say against his mouth. "I just… I want you. Now."
He made a sound low in his throat and his hands gripped my hips, pulling me harder against him. I could feel his hardness against my belly through our clothes.
Then we were moving and I don't even know how we got to the bed but suddenly his weight was on top of me and his mouth was on my neck and I was tearing at his shirt, trying to get it off.
When he finally pushed inside me, I gasped and dug my fingers into his shoulders. He moved and I moved with him and it was messy and desperate and perfect.
Afterward, we did it again. Slower this time. He took his time, his hands learning what made me gasp, what made my back arch off the bed, what made me say his name in a way I'd never said anyone's name before.
The third time was even slower. Lazy, almost. Like we had all the time in the world.
When we finally stopped, I was lying with my head on his chest, watching the moonlight stretch across the sheets. His fingers traced patterns on my shoulder. Neither of us said anything.
We didn't need to.
I listened to his heartbeat slow. His hand moved across my back, fingertips dragging up my spine, pausing at my shoulder blade, then sliding down over the curve of my hip and back up again. Like he was memorizing me.
I should probably say something. Break the silence. But every time I opened my mouth, nothing came out.
Finally, I managed, "That was..."
Nothing. I had absolutely nothing.
His chest moved under my cheek as he breathed out. "Yeah." His voice was rougher than usual, scraped raw. "It was."
I shifted, propping myself up on my elbow so I could see his face. The moonlight came through the window at an angle, cutting across the bed, turning everything silver and shadow.
He looked different like this. His hair was a mess. My fault; I'd had my hands in it. His mouth was softer, not pressed into that careful line he always wore. And his eyes... God, his eyes. They weren't guarded anymore. Weren't calculating or controlled or any of the things I'd gotten used to.
He just looked like a guy lying in bed after making love. Tired. Open. A little vulnerable, even.
My chest did something weird. Tightened and ached at the same time.
"What happens now?"
His hand stopped moving on my back. He looked at me for a long moment, and I watched something flicker across his face. Uncertainty, maybe. Fear, possibly. Then his jaw tightened and his arms pulled me closer against him.
"I don't know," he said. His thumb brushed along my spine. "But I'm not letting you go."
I leaned down and kissed him. Soft. Slow. Not like before, not hungry or frantic. Just my mouth on his, gentle and sure. A promise, maybe. Or a question. I wasn't entirely certain which.
His hand came up to cup my face, his thumb stroking my cheekbone. He kissed me back the same way, careful, like I was something precious he didn't want to break. When we finally pulled apart, I rested my forehead against his. Our breath mingled in the small space between us.
Tomorrow, we'd have to figure everything out. The competition. What this meant. All the very good reasons this was a terrible idea.
But tomorrow wasn't here yet.
Right now, his hand was warm on my face. His other arm was wrapped around my waist. I could feel his heartbeat against my ribs and his breath on my lips. I kissed him again. Just because I could. Just because he was here and I was here and nothing else seemed to matter.
He smiled against my mouth. I felt it more than I saw it. Then he rolled us over, settled his weight on top of me, and kissed me properly. Deeply. His hand slid into my hair and I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer.
We stayed like that for a while. Kissing slowly in the moonlight. His hands were wandering, mine doing the same. Learning each other all over again. Eventually, he slid inside me again, pushing me over the edge.
He was perfect.
