They moved to the bed, clothing gradually discarded, and Luisa looked at Nadia's body with genuine curiosity... different from Bel's and different from Luisa's, more voluptuous, less toned, although this was all relative. Nadia was still a fashion model after all.
Luisa's mouth went to Nadia's breast, her tongue circling Nadia's nipple, drawing a long, soft moan, erotic but also,Luisa couldn't help thinking, slightly exaggerated, slightly performative.
As they continued Luisa recognised the performance because she was doing it too, moaning at appropriate moments, arching into Nadia's touch in ways that Luisa had learned that men responded to. With a sinking feeling she realised that they were both, at least in part, acting. Both going through the motions that led to pleasure but without that genuine, all-consuming connection she'd experienced with Bel.
When Nadia's hand slipped between Luisa's legs, her fingers finding the right spot and touching her gently, she felt her body responding, the arousal undeniable. Without a doubt it was still fun for Luisa, even without the connection, but she longed for the emotional depth to go with it.
She closed her eyes, trying to focus on the physical, and Nadia's fingers were doing everything right, sensitive to Luisa's needs and her reaction, but instead of being lost in the pleasure Luisa found herself mentally directing the scene... tilting her head back performatively, letting out a long, shuddering moan that she only partially felt, making little gasps of encouragement at the right moments.
When Luisa finally came it felt good, undeniably good, but only good. Better than Miguel could manage, but about as good as Luisa could often achieve on her own and not even close to the earth shattering, soul shaking pleasure that Bel had given her again and again on that incredible night.
But still, she felt her back arching, genuinely, her hands uncontrollably grabbing at Nadia's body, a series of loud cries coming from her mouth, muffled by Nadia's lips kissing hermessily. It was good. It was worth it. More than worth it, it was good sex without a doubt.
Afterwards, Luisa reciprocated. Moving down Nadia's body, she applied everything she'd learned from Bel supplemented by everything she'd read online in the intervening period... tracing patterns with her tongue, using her fingers in tandem, paying close attention to how Nadia responded and adjusting accordingly.
Nadia came much quicker than Luisa had expected, noisily, performative again but seemingly genuine, her thighs tightening around Luisa's head, her hands pushing Luisa's tongue away when she couldn't take any more. Luisa felt a sense of satisfaction that she'd been able to draw that sort of response from Nadia without guidance, pleased that she seemed to know what to do with a woman now even though it was only Luisa's second time.
They lay beside each other after that, close but barely touching, a careful distance between them as if they both sensed that the performance was over. They talked for a while, pleasant but superficial conversation talking about cities they'd both been to and mutual acquaintances in the industry. Only superficial topics, nothing of substance.
Around two Luisa made her excuses and left, citing an early call time in the morning, a perfunctory kiss at the door acknowledging what had happened between them but also, seemingly, that it was a one-time thing.
Over the rest of the shoot there was no awkwardness between them, on a personal level they were friendly, but there was no chance of a repeat performance, and Luisa had no desire for one.
She left Cancun to fly back home even more confused than before... if her encounter with Nadia had been amazing it would have told her something, if it had been terrible it would have told her something too, but instead it had been good. That was all... good, bordering on very good.
So, she knew now that she enjoyed sleeping with a woman that wasn't Bel, so shehadlearned something. But she also knew now that just any woman wouldn't do... obvious in hindsight, but something she just had to experience for herself to know.
Mexico City
It all fell apart with Miguel a couple of days after her return. Luisa had been quiet, preoccupied, and he could tell.
He confronted her, accused her of having another boyfriend, and despite her trying to explain to him that that wasn't how the world of modelling worked, that you didn't have the same people in each place, he wouldn't hear of it.
She came close, very close in the heat of a blazing row to telling him just how wrong he was, that she'd slept with two female models and was wondering if she was gay, but she held her tongue... partly out of fear for what he might do, not physically but emotionally, his conservative upbringing coming with an unhealthy dose of homophobia, and partly because it would be unfair to lay it on him that she'd slept with someone else.
In the end, they went their separate ways. It was clear to both of them that they'd grown too far apart, particularly when Luisa made it crystal clear that modelling was her profession and shewasn't going to settle down and be the good, dutiful wife that he expected any time soon.
Her parents, surprisingly, were understanding, her father letting slip in a moment of candour that they'd had their doubts about Miguel and that Luisa could find better. It was with their support and blessing that she made the difficult decision to move a few weeks later, renting an apartment in Mexico City to be closer to the heart of the fashion scene in Mexico.
And it was there, single and thrust into a much more happening, vibrant scene, that Luisa started to really discover herself.
***
Luisa had always known it, really, but moving to the big city hit home that as a model making good progress in the industry it really, really wasn't hard to have a lot of fun. She had a few friends living there already that gave her a solid base, grounding her when the party life got a bit too much, but beyond them the connections she was making and the access she had to people and events meant that she could, and often would, get into all the top clubs and bars, not to mention the industry events.
It was obvious, really, in hindsight but for Luisa as she neared nineteen it was a major realisation after two years dating Miguel and the small town life in Aguascalientes that, if you’re pretty close to being a ten out of ten yourself, then it’s no problem getting a lot of attention and you can afford to be discerning about only going for the nines and tens yourself.
She stayed clear of anyone who was excessively powerful or rich… in Mexico at that time you could quickly get caught upin something that you really didn’t want to be involved in. But that still left a lot of options and, for the first six months in the big city, she went a little wild, dating a string of men, none of them for long enough to call it a relationship but similarly none of them just one night stands, and funnily enough no women. The fashion industry in Mexico wasn’t quite ready for an openly lesbian model, not yet.
Looking back, Luisa realised that in large part she’d been trying to make up for lost time having dated Miguel for so long, but then also after a while she'd been trying to replace him, to recapture a little of what she’d had with him. In many ways it was six months of her rebounding hard, but rather than landing somewhere good she ended up ricocheting from one person to another.
It was after ending things with one of the guys that Luisa looked at herself in the mirror and realised that she was actually dreading the date with a new guy that she had that night, not because she didn’t like him but simply because she was tired of putting on the performance yet again, of getting to know someone afresh, when none of them seemed to have the electric connection that she still craved and that, so far, she’d only ever achieved on that one night with Bel.
***
For the next year work took over, her career building nicely. While Luisa didn't have much exposure yet outside the region, the work in the US coming through but slower than she'd have liked, she was building a name for herself locally without a doubt. It had got to the point by then that she would be the mainname on some of the smaller shoots that she went on, something that she was pleased with at the age of just nineteen.
Throughout that year she had little time for much else, and certainly no time for relationships. Not that there weren't the occasional nights or people she might date for a few weeks but they were few and far between, although she did start to experiment with women as well as men too…
