The cemetery is quiet when we arrive. I hold the bouquet of lilies against my chest as we walk down the gravel path together, the sound of our steps the only thing breaking the stillness.
Mom’s name is carved into the stone in that familiar way that still makes my chest tighten.
Hazel Gracelyn. Wife of Luke Gracelyn. Mother of Madelyn Hazel Gracelyn and Noah Luke Gracelyn. A sunshine in soul form. Loved and remembered.
There are already flowers resting at the base. I add the lilies beside them, straightening the ribbon before stepping back between Noah and Dad.
We stay there for a while, talking the way we always do. Updating her on the café. On school. On small town gossip. On the things she missed and the things we still wish we could tell her in person.
“Oh,” Noah says casually, glancing down at the stone. “She’s dating Ryan now. Can you believe it, Mom?”
Heat rushes to my face. I rub my hands on my jeans. “Yeah,” I mutter. “Kind of unexpected.”
Dad bumps my shoulder gently. “She probably would’ve known about your feelings before you did.”
I laugh, but it comes out a little thin.
We talk about some more old memories.
Noah, of course, tells the story about me almost burning the kitchen down trying to make pancakes when I was eight. And mom walked in, just as I was about to set off the fireextinguisher. Her entire face was fully covered in white. We all laughed so hard.
And Dad tells the one we all know by heart. How he used to work at the café when it belonged to my grandmother. How Mom came in every morning before her work and ordered a chai latte with extra cinnamon. How he dropped milk cans, mixed up orders, or pretended he wasn’t staring. And how he eventually asked her out. And how years later, when he took over the café, he named it Hazel & Bean.
When it’s finally time to leave, we hug each other tightly, holding on a little longer than usual. And the drive home is quiet. “Songbird” by Fleetwood Mac hums softly through the speakers while the road rolls past outside the window.
I pull out my phone, and there are already some messages waiting for me.
DAWN:love you Mads
TESS:we are thinking about you today
DAPHNE: your Mom would be proud of you
I stare at the screen for a moment. I feel my eyes burning slightly. They always adored my Mom, and she adored them right back. It always feels good to talk to them on this day.
A couple more messages are waiting.
KIARA:thinking about you today
MEL:be gentle with yourself
LIAM:hope you’re doing okay :)
RYAN:good luck today
My eyes linger on Ryan’s message a second longer than the others.
Later that night, I head upstairs. Noah pauses at the top of the stairs and opens his arms. “Think you can handle one more hug today?”
I laugh softly and step into it. He holds on tight, while I disappear into his chest, and he ruffles my hair when we pull apart.
“That was a very big-brother hug,” I say.
“Special occasion,” he replies. “Don’t get used to it.”
I nudge him with my elbow before heading to my room. As I close the door behind me, I reach for my phone to put on some music. Before I can, a notification lights up the screen.
RYAN:hey, how are you holding up?
