“Cindel?” I hear my name in a voice that doesn’t match my roommate. The other person beneath the sheets, pops their head out. Tousled red waves are pushed back from the face of the girl,who has a knack for making shit get weird, real fast. She climbs atop the covers, before settling on the bed beside my friend. Holy. Shit.
Andrea pulls the covers high over her chest, looking between Mairead and I, as if one of us should be the first to speak. Is… is Mairead wearing the Prince tee, I bought Andrea for her birthday?!
Dimples appear in her cheeks, paired with a devious smile. Like the cat who just caught the canary, she beams while pulling up her flaming locks into a top bun.
“Sorry… I should have knocked. Ummm, I’m going to go…” I retreat quickly, closing the door to the far-fetched scene I just stumbled into. From the other room, I can still hear clipped words, along with the slamming of drawers. A few moments later, Andrea and hercurrentpartner vacate the room. This time, I am pleased to find them, more clothed than before.
My roommate pulls Mairead in close to her. Despite my presence, Mairead takes the opportunity to lick up the side of Andrea’s face. She groans, wipes away the spot with her shoulder, and faintly smiles.
Mairead grabs her bag from the table, which I didn’t even notice when I first arrived. She gives a princess parade wave. “Got to run! I have to meet up my stupid brothers. Text me later, Silver Bullet. Bye Cin Cin!!! I’m glad you're done being grumpy!”
As soon as the door to our apartment closes, I pierce Andrea with a look of dismay and a touch of,what the actual fuck? “Silver Bullet? Cin Cin?!” I mimic.
“I know, I know! It just kind of… happened.” She paces the length of the living room, all while giving me the rundown. Rattling on about how the daft girl saved her, using phrases like, ‘it’s different’ and ‘she gets me.’
“Soooo. This is the first time?”
She halts in place and begins to chew on her lip.
“Oh. Wow… okay. I thought you didn’t like her? You called her crazy… remember?”
She comes to join me on the couch, facing me fully. “She’s like… theyingto myyang.”
I’ve never heard anything so… so sentimental, come out of her mouth. Let alone, something pertaining to a partner. It’s always just been a fling.
“I really like being with her. She’s just wild enough that I don’t need to constantly worry about her. No need for protection.”
I can’t stop the words from spilling out of my mouth. “Like me?”
Andrea’s eyes widen, her hand extends toward me, and lands on my knee. “You know I didn’t mean it like that.”
I can’t help but feel as though I’ve been more of a burden to her, than a friend of her choosing. Taking her hand in mine, I remind myself to work through these emotions, as opposed to bottling them up. No more running. I’ve chosen to return. To repair whatever is salvageable. I refuse to be filled with,What ifs? Constantly questioning if I should have put forth more effort. I’m putting all my chips on black. I’m all in.
“I’m happy for you.” I say with my whole being. We’re all reshaping our lives. One choice at a time. “But if she hurts you, she’s going to be the one who needs protection,” I proclaim.
Her eyebrow lifts, followed by a playful grin, then she squeezes my hand. “Take it easy killer! Let’s keep it to one cling-wrapped body a year, kapeesh?”
Ugh, is nothing unknown to this woman!
On my bed sat a pair of purple rain boots with a bow. “Surprise,” Andrea sing-songs.
I pull her into a hug. We stay just like that, for long moments. It wasn’t about shoes but what they represent. How our friendship is more than just an accessory, but the foundationof the outfit. I now understand, she wasn’t here because she was expected to be… Andrea stayed because she’s, my friend.
Together we strip the sheets from my bed and unpack my bags. After everything is put away, we move onto the kitchen, to scrounge up ingredients for dinner. I was so sick of soup, but was grateful to stay in. Somehow, vague ingredients of pasta, broth, and expired spices from the shelf became a delicious meal. Seems like no one has grocery shopped in weeks!
Andrea tells me about all I’ve missed, during my time away. It almost slipped my mind… I reveal the other reason, why I came home. The interview.
“It’s strange… I remember doing a job search, but I don’t recall applying for this. All the same, I’m actually excited."
An indent on Andrea’s previously licked cheek forms as her lips migrate to one side. Her downward cast stare makes me immediately on edge.
“What?” I narrow my gaze, trying to figure out what thatlookmeans. “What’d you do, Andrea…?” I cross my arms in response to her obvious,I know something you don’t know, expression.
“Meeeee?” She disputes with a slightly raised voice. “I didn’t do anything. For once. Although, I may happen to know someone who applied to a couple jobs in the area, with the belief you would come back to Southie.”
No. Dax? He did this?
“You know… I see Dax kind of regularly at the boxing club. I started taking lessons there. He’s given me some great pointers.”
