JUNIPER
People kept coming up to congratulate me. It was weird, to say the least. Even the women who’d been friends with Eugenia patted me on the back and apologized half-heartedly. They didn’t look happy about what had gone down, but I think Eugenia’s reaction to losing might have shown themexactlywhat kind of person she was. That was fine. Everyone had a fresh start now.
“Susan,” Linnea called out, beckoning a woman at the far side of the dining hall. “Can you take a look at June’s wounds?”
The woman had been a nurse prior to coming to Hidden Grove. She hurried over to inspect the bites on my ankle and arm, as well as the other scratches.
“These are all mostly superficial,” she said, eyeing the ankle. “Though, the ones on your ankle are a bit deep. I don’t think anything needs stitches. I’m gonna go grab some bandages. Come see me if they get red or inflamed. We’ve got a supply of antibiotics and things if you need them.”
“Thank you,” I said, smiling gratefully at her. “I appreciate that.”
Within five minutes, my wounds were cleaned and bandaged. When Susan was done, Linnea set a heaping bowlof stew down before me, along with a giant chunk of steaming sourdough with a knob of butter melting into the nooks and crannies.
“Here. You deserve a hearty meal,” she said as she took her seat beside me.
“Good lord, you gave me enough to feed a horse,” I said, though that didn’t stop me from digging in. I’d been so stressed about the fight, my stomach had been twisted in anxious knots. I’d barely eatenanythingsince the big meal the night before.
“Things looked a bit awkward with you and Levi earlier.”
“Yeah, well, I’m not exactly happy with him right now.”
“Maybe he left before the fight because he was scared. Worried about how things would work out?”
I laughed bitterly. “That’s fine, but there’s no way he was more scared than I was.” My appetite vanished, and I shoved the food away. “I’m gonna go hit the hay. I’m wiped.”
Linnea looked disappointed. “Are you sure? I was gonna sneak some wine out of the pantry. I thought we could get hammered and talk about what a badass you were.”
I squeezed her shoulder as I stood. “Maybe another time. Thanks though. I appreciate you being there for me. Even if Levi wasn’t.”
She looked a little sad when I left, but thankfully, she didn’t try to stop me or follow me. I wasn’t in the mood for conversation.
Back in my room, I lay down and stared at the ceiling. The exhaustion and fading adrenaline sent me into a dreamless sleep in less than five minutes.
When I wokethe next morning, I lay there for a few minutes, trying to figure out if what had happened the day before had been real or a fantasy. It took a few seconds, but then reality sunk in. Ihadbeaten Eugenia. I could stay here and be Levi’s mate. The problem was, I didn’t know if I really wanted to be his mate anymore. I cared deeply for him—I wanted him—but could those feelings override the other stuff that had sprung up lately? A new, more worrisome idea occurred to me. What if Levi didn’t really want me? What if he wanted someone like Naphele? God, what if he was hoping I was her reincarnation? That was highly unlikely, but it was known to happen with shifters from time to time. I’d never met anyone who’d been reincarnated, but perhaps Levi was placing all his hopes on that.
The thought made my stomach turn, sending a faint wave of nausea through me. If either of those ideas were correct, then everything between us was in question.
Suddenly, my room felt overly hot and small. I needed to get some fresh air. I got out of bed and threw on my clothes. When I got outside, I realized I’d slept late. The sun was well in the sky. I’d probably missed breakfast, but that didn’t matter. I wasnotin the mood to talk to anyone, not even to Linnea.
I looked toward the distant mountain, where a gray finger of rock jutted out. The overlook Levi had taken me too. His old mate’s favorite place. At the back of my mind,deepin my subconscious, a whispering voice urged me to go there. It might be a good place to contemplate things. To decide whether I wanted to forgive Levi, or if I’d need to make different plans. I decided to go for it, heading straight for the forest before anyone—especially Levi—saw me.
Once I was in the forest and a good distance away from town, I slowed to a walk, enjoying the silence and nature. I listened for any noises that might indicate the Red Maw pack was around. It was dangerous to be out here alone, but the tracks had beenfound closer to Hidden Grove, not around here. Either way, I didn’t care. All I wanted was to get to that overlook, far away from anyone and anything, so I could think.
The hike tookmuchlonger than it had when I’d ridden on Levi’s back. Nearly two hours later, I finally walked out of the trees toward the massive, jutting rock. The day was quite warm, and a slight sheen of sweat coated my forehead as I took a seat, though further back than I had the last time. Heights really did creep me out.
Huge, fluffy clouds drifted across the cobalt sky. As a kid, I’d always thought of clouds as massive, floating puffs of cotton candy. The thought brought a smile to my face, but it faded quickly as I wondered how many times Naphele had sat here and looked at this same sky. How many times had she sat rightherewith Levi? The woman had been dead for a century, yet she still felt like the third member of this relationship. Another woman in the shadows, orchestrating what happened between me and Levi. I could picture her tugging strings like Levi was a puppet.
I shook my head. That wasn’t fair. Levi was his own person, making his own decisions. But I couldn’t help what I was feeling. He was still completely wrapped up in her, and I wasn’t sure he could ever truly let her go. And if he couldn’t, then what future did we have together? What future did I haveanywhereat this point? It seemed like I wasn’t good enough for anyone.
“June?”
I screamed. My heart leapt to my throat as I spun to face whatever attacker had cornered me here. Red Maw, Eugenia coming for revenge, maybe even Levi pissed off that I’d run into the woods alone. Any of those would have made more sense than the person standing there.
“Anders?” I gasped, putting a hand to my chest, feeling the thundering beat of my heart as it slammed against my sternum.
“Did I scare you?” he said, looking more sheepish than I’d ever seen him in his life. “Sorry.”
Sheepishandapologizing? I had to be dreaming. I was still asleep in my bed back in the bunkhouse, and all this was some mental fantasy playing out. What else could possibly be the reason for this?
