“Seriously. Did you and Levi… you know,dosomething?”
The tone of her voice, playful and free of judgment, eased my mind a bit. I didn’t want to kiss and tell, but I was desperate to talk to someone about it. I’d had sex with the hottest man I’d ever met. I had experienced an intense orgasm that wasn’t from my own hand. My body had become clay in his hands, bending to his will, and I’d loved every fucking minute of it. With Beatrice back home, Linnea was the best friend I had at the moment, and if I didn’t get it out, I felt like my skull might explode.
“We did,” I finally said. “We had sex.”
“Oh mygod,” Linnea said, putting a hand to her mouth in shock. “Really?”
“Yeah.” I dunked a cornbread muffin into the bowl of chili and started chopping it up with my spoon.
She stared at me expectantly for several seconds before leaning even closer. “And?”
I let out a low, humorless chuckle even as heat crept into my cheeks. “It was really good. Like,fantastic.”
She shook her head in awe. “That’s huge, June.”
“What do you mean?” I said, looking up from my food. “Why?”
“From what I hear, even after all these years, Levi has neveroncetaken a woman to bed. You’re the first, as far as I know.”
Confused, I frowned. After a century of rescuing young, unmated women and men, Levi had neveronceended up withsomeone in his bed? Could that really be possible? Everyone had needs. Surely, he’d have explored those at some point.
“As far as youknow?” a voice behind us said.
Linnea and I both snapped our heads around to see Eugenia at the table opposite us, a haughty look on her face. We’d kept our voices low, but shifters had enhanced hearing, and it appeared we’d not been quiet enough. Several of her group of friends sat with her, eyeing me with animosity.
Eugenia chuckled lightly at the looks of surprise on mine and Linnea’s face. “Not everyone knows the kind of man Levi is,” she said. “I, for one, knowexactlywhat he likes and doesn’t like. It’s okay, June. You don’t have to be ashamed of being the flavor of the week. Enjoy it while it lasts. Come on, ladies. I’ve lost my appetite,” she added, glancing at her friends.
The small group stood and departed.
Linnea shook her head when the door closed. “I don’t think she knows what she’s talking about. I’ve never heard anything like that. I think Eugenia is jealous. That’s all. Don’t worry about what she said.”
Her words meant little to me, because Eugenia’s statement fell in line with the same thoughts I’d been having a moment before she spoke. Maybe Levididlike to swoop in and seduce some of the new ladies? If that was the case, though, wouldn’t more people know about it? Linnea seemed to be on friendly terms with nearly everyone here. Ifshe’dnever heard of it, then surely Eugenia was lying. Even then, it still made me uneasy. Was I being too trusting with Levi? Could I really be nothing more than a new toy to play with and then discard? That thought didn’t ring true, but my own insecurities made it hard to cast aside fully.
We ate in silence after that. As I finished dinner, my mind flicked back and forth between the amazing time I’d had with Levi to imagined situations he’d had with other women. Ipictured him, decade after decade, seducing and making love to women. I had no reason to judge him if he did, it was his personal life, after all—and I had been the one to ask for lessons in seduction; I had consented to everything that had happened—but it still stung. Something about the way he’d looked at me and touched me, had made me feel special. He made me forget all my troubles and problems.
As I drifted off to sleep later that night, it was with Levi, rather than Anders, on my mind.
16
LEVIATHAN
The pounding knock at the door roused me from sleep. Groaning, I rolled over, checking the clock by the bed. Six in the morning? I sighed, rubbing my eyes. I’d gone out running until almost three, desperate to burn off some of the excited energy after my time with June. My wolf had been overjoyed to have made love to her. I was too, but beneath it was a faint trace of guilt.
I’d spent a hundred years trying to find Naphele, and I thought I now had, but the more I got to know June, the more I realized she was her own person, a wholly formed individual. A powerful part of my subconscious felt terrible for even trying to pursue her, given I’d been after a totally different woman. By the time I’d come home to crawl in bed, I’d begun to think of myself as an asshole.
When I realized I hadn’t thought of Naphele once while I was inside June, the shame had nearly drowned me. I had been wholly and completely with June, and all thoughts of my old mate had vanished. It had been exciting and exhilarating, but then it had struck me, and everything changed. I’d made June feel awkward too, so I was a jackass in more ways than one. The guilt was almost crippling.
Bang-bang-bang.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” I muttered. “Hang the hell on!’
I tugged on some pajama bottoms and shoes, then trudged to the door. The frigid air blew in as I swung it open, chilling my bare chest. Rainier strode past me, rubbing his hands up and down his arms.
“You could have come to the door sooner. It’s cold as shit out there,” he said as I closed the door.
“I’m sorry,” I said, sarcasm and grogginess lacing my voice. “I’m not used to some asshole knocking on my door before the sun comes up.”
Ignoring me, Rainier reached into his jacket and pulled out an ancient-looking piece of paper, shaking it triumphantly.
