But the number one way to my heart is sharing a meal with me. Eating alone sucks. I’ll eat with Ray when he’s free, but time is a rarity for him these days.
Besides managing me—which, according to Ray, is already a full-time job all on its own—he also needs to coordinate with all my sponsors, producers, event planners, and anyone else who makes the Milo Tobitt brand run like a well-oiled machine.
Who those people are, don’t ask me. That’s what I have Ray for.
Besides the work that’s related to me, he’s been asked by his company to be a mentor in some kind of mentorship program. I’m not too sure about the details, but Ray is super excited about it, so he had happily agreed. Which means even more of his time is being eaten up.
I’m very happy for him and fully support him doing whatever makes him happy—he deserves that—but it also means I’m down a meal partner. Jack has been with me for years and is great and amazing at his job, but he’s a real stickler for rules and what’sappropriate. He rarely engages in conversation and refuses to eat with me. And now that his daughter has given birth to his first grandchild, he’s hoping to go into semi-retirement.
Which is why I’m in need of a new bodyguard. One that I insisted on picking myself. One that will not only keep me safe but maybe, possibly, keep me company.
Is a bit of conversation really too much to ask for? And since we’re all human and need to eat anyway, why not just eat together? I really don’t think I’m asking for that much, especially since I’m excellent company! People love hanging out with me.
And by people, I mean Ray and Ethel. Although Ray is usually grumbling about one thing or another, and Ethel insisted on staying at her nursing home instead of moving in with me, claiming she’s too old for my life of debauchery, which I’m a thousand percent sure she’s getting more action than me.
Nursing homes are wild.
Nevertheless, I know they both love hanging out with me.
But my social circle can’t be comprised of two people, and thus my search for a bodyguard began…and it seems the end is here because Rowan isperfect!
“You told the company that I want Rowan, right? He’s going to be my official bodyguard now, yes?”
Ray looks up from the pan of scrambled egg whites he’s cooking.
“For the tenth time in the last five minutes, yes, and you continuously asking won’t change that.” He shoots me a glare that slides right off me.
“Good, because he’s perfect for the job!” I say with a grin.
Ray slides a plate of the limp-looking eggs in front of me—yuck!—and boinks me on the top of my head.
“More like he’s easy to manipulate,” Ray replies.
“I can’t help that I’m charming.”
I flash my award-winning smile at him, and Ray pretends to gag.
Rude.
“But I wasn’t able to persuade him to spend the night. I guess nobody’s perfect,” I say with an overly dramatic sigh.
“Not even you, huh?”
“Besides me, of course,” I quickly add and flutter my lashes at him.
Ray laughs heartily and ruffles my hair. He knows I don’t really think I’m perfect—far from that, in fact, but he indulges me anyway.
He takes his own plate of scrambled egg whites and sits beside me at the island. Instead of eating, he’s looking at me with an expression that tells me that big brain of his is going a mile a minute again.
I take a bite of my eggs while I wait for him to speak his mind. It’s as bland as I thought they’d be, and a far cry from the explosion of flavors from the Thai I had last night. If not for the event I have to attend in a few days, I wouldn’t touch this with a ten-foot pole.
Who thought eating eggs without any of the yolky, gooey, deliciousness would be a good idea, anyway?
“Just eat it quietly,” Ray suddenly orders, like he can hear my thoughts, then he sighs. “Sometimes I think I’m taking care of a child.”
“I’m twenty-eight this year, I’ll have you know. And I’m fully able to take care of myself!” I say with a huff.
“I reallywish I could peel back your brain and see what’s in there. I wouldn’t be surprised to find ninety-five percent of it full of song and lyrics, and the remaining five are what you sustain your every day on.”
