I’m silent, trying to picture it: Scarlett collapsing into my husband’s arms with gratitude while my sick daughter slept in the other room. I want to ask what happened after that, but I won’t be able to handle it.
So I press my palms on my thighs, fighting a tremor of anger that ripples through me. “Get out.”
She lingers in the doorway, lips parted like she might say more, then pulls the door shut with a soft click.
My eyes blur with tears, but I blink them back.
The hot coal of betrayal burns in my chest and I let it, because anger is better than the numbness threatening to hollow me out.
But beneath all of it, stronger than everything else, is resolve. I will get out of here, go into that camp, and I will find my daughter and convince her to come home with me. And Scarlett will never touch anything I love again.
TWENTY-THREE
Gabriel comes to stand in the doorway as I finalize my packing and get ready to leave. “Judy, are you sure you want to do this?”
A few minutes ago, he tried to talk to me again about what he did, to apologize and beg for my forgiveness, but I cut him off. So he switched to trying to get me to change my mind, saying he does not want me to end up disappointed when I don’t find Sadie, as he’s sure I won’t. Pretending a little too late to care about me, like Scarlett did this morning.
I glance out the windows at the crashing waves, then take a breath to control my emotions before I turn to the man I loved enough to marry, feeling that burn inside my chest from what he has done to me, to us.
As much as I want to lash out at him, I refuse to go there, refuse to give it my energy. I wept enough last night.
What good would it do anyway to fight with him? There’s no longer a marriage to try and restore.
Our relationship no longer deserves my attention. Of course my heart is broken and my ego is bruised, but as much as it would bring me so much satisfaction to lunge at him and claw his eyes out, Gabriel and I are done. As far as I’m concerned, this will end in us going our separate ways.
No point in dwelling on something that can’t be undone, when I need to focus fully on finding Sadie.
“I already said I’m doing this.” I zip up the small suitcase I normally use as hand luggage when traveling on a plane.
He takes a few steps into the room and stands there, shifting from one foot to the other. Gabriel is not the kind of man who is often nervous, at least not in front of other people.
The confidence he brings to the courtroom usually escorts him through life. But now, as he stands there in front of me, he looks like a child who has been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. I’m the one who had the honor of seeing the weak parts of him. I just didn’t know he was weak enough to make stupid decisions.
“Judy, before you go, please let’s talk about…I don’t know what to say. What I did…”
“There’s no point. There’s nothing more to explain. You did what you did, and the only thing we can do now is focus on finding our daughter, if she’s still out there.”
The sparkle in his eye gives away his emotions, but he blinks quickly and then reaches into his pocket. “I found out that they no longer allow electronics in the camp. Apparently, they used to for the adults, but now the rule applies to all guests.”
I already know that from visiting their website. That’s why I didn’t pack my laptop or iPad. But I can’t go in there without any contact with the outside world, so I was going to find a way to sneak my phone inside.
He reaches into his pocket and hands me something rectangular. “This is a burner phone. If they demand to have your phone, give them this one. I doubt they will suspect you have two. I advise you to keep it switched off just in case. It would be great if you keep in touch and update us.”
Us? Him and Scarlett? It almost sounds as though they are married, and I will be updating the couple.
I swallow the hot lump inside my throat and take the phone, dropping it into my handbag. My main phone is in a hidden side pocket. Unless they scan me, they won’t know I have it.
He shoves his hands into his pockets and remains standing there. He doesn’t look ready to go away.
“I should get going.” After hours of waiting, I’m ready to get out of here.
Gabriel attempts to take my suitcase from me, to carry it to the car, but I reject his offer, stepping away from him. “I’m fine. I’ll manage.”
I wheel the suitcase past him and on my way down the hall, I see Scarlett standing in front of her door, holding Coco.
I don’t say anything to her, just walk straight to the front door, wondering what they will be doing without me here. If they’re really no longer together and are just friends as they claim, what if being alone in the apartment sparks what they felt for each other back then and they pick up where they left off? I did tell them they could do whatever they wanted now.
I didn’t mean it. I’d never feel comfortable with my friend being with my husband even if he’s no longer mine.
