“That doesn’t make it hurt any less.”
“No,” he murmurs. “It doesn’t.”
We both go quiet. It’s heavy— the sad reality of our circumstances. My thumb brushes his thigh. He’s so damnsoft.
Cade’s stomach groans.
I chuckle. He blushes again. I’m gonna lose it.
“Your food is getting cold.”
He rubs his nose with his sleeve, the tiny diamond stud in his nostril catching the light as he stares at the sandwich. Finally, he gingerly tears off a piece and brings it to his mouth.
I hold my breath.
His eyes widen. Then he snatches the rest and begins eating in earnest. His eyes close with a hum. Warmth swells my chest.
“That good?”
His head bobs. “So fucking good.” He sucks grease from his fingers. “Like sex.”
My hand rolls into a fist. I can’t stand the idea of someone else having him. Especially this side of him. It’smine.
Goddammit, I’m so fucked.
“You’re still mad about Marcus.”
Just hearing that fucker’s name throws me into a pit of hellfire.
“He’s a piece of shit.”
Cade shrugs. “So am I.”
I recoil as if he slapped me. “No, you’re not.”
He picks at the remaining crust, crumbs sprinkling his lap. “You’re only saying that because I scared you.”
It’s like he's grinding sand into a raw blister. I grasp his chin, tilting his face up. “Yeah, you scared the hell out of me, and yeah, I’ve been a dick, but not because I think you’re a piece of shit.”
“Why then?” he rasps.
My thumb presses into the center of his bottom lip. Unlikebefore, I let myself openly admire him. He’s so fucking beautiful it hurts.
“Because I know I can’t have you the way I want.”
Those eyes shatter. “You can, though.”
A million reasons sit on my tongue.You’re my stepbrother. My religion forbids me from being with a man. I’m a coward. If I make you mine in that way, I’ll never let you go… and I can’t keep you.
I sigh. “Not tonight.”
He shrinks into the oversized hoodie. If only he knew that pushing him away is killing me by a thousand cuts. My palm finds his cheek. He leans into my touch.
“Don’t leave me yet,” he whispers.
As if I could.
“I’ll make you a deal,” I say, skimming his cheekbone with the pad of my thumb. He peers up at me with those stained-glass eyes. I’m going to regret this. “You eat the rest, you can sleep in my bed tonight… with me.”
