Heat trickles from the corner of my eye.
Tears.
The line between his brows deepens as I shake my head. He’s misunderstanding. He doesn’t know what he’s just shown me.
Thisis how it should’ve been.
How it should always be.
And I’m breaking becausethiswas stolen from me.
Fromus.
It’s not until he hushes me and hugs me fully against his chest that I realize I’m trembling. Burying my face in his neck, I clench to keep his cock in me; I’m not ready for us to separate.
“Did… someone else hurt you like that?”
I squeeze my eyes shut.
And nod.
I’ve never admitted it before. Not in the mandated therapy sessions at Crestview. Not to my parents. Not even to myself.
Remy swallows audibly, his palms flattening on my waist. His jaw flexes. “Against your will?”
The ache in my throat triples.
Again, I nod.
A hand smooths up my spine, to grasp the base of my neck. His lips whisper against my temple, “Thank you for trusting me.”
Everything I want to say perches on my tongue, begging to be set free here in this bubble where the nightmares can’t touch me. Where I’m cared for and safe.
The invisible muzzle I’ve worn my entire life falls away.
“Thankyoufor saving my life.”
The fingers idly tracing the rose inked on my ribs pause.
“How so?”
This man isn’t the fragile boy I was desperate to shield from the world’s horrors. No, this compassionate, intelligent, empathetic soul is my haven and he’s waiting for me to accept the shelter he’s offering.
It’s about time I take it.
“The day my dad died, I was already fucked up. In my head, on booze and some other shit— I was a fucking trainwreck, and not because he wouldn’t let me take him to the hospital the night before, but because he didn’tnotice. No one did. Ever. I've always been invisible. Mom and Richard gave up trying to contact me. Dad didn’t know I was failing out or that I was alwaysdrunk and high. Hedefinitelydidn’t know what I did to get those drugs or why I started using in the first place…” My voice cracks. Fuck, this is hard. Remy’s soothing fingers resume drawing lazy patterns between my shoulder blades, dulling the sharp edges of the agonizing truth. “He just had to die onthatfucking day and remind me I was all alone. All alone and so done with everything that I… took a bunch of pills…”
His fingers still. Dig into my skin. My mouth is bone dry as I rasp, “But then I thought of you. Of how much I fucking missed you and how badly I wanted to be with you.Youstopped me, Remy. I couldn’t— couldn’t leave without seeing you one more time.”
Soundless sobs drown out the rest. Remy cradles the back of my head, rocking us slowly. “Shh, you’re not alone anymore, love. I’m here and I’m not going anywhere,” he chokes. “I’m yours. Always have been, always will be.”
Over and over, he murmurs reassurances between soft kisses. First, on my neck. Then my jaw, my ear, my cheek, my wet eyes and my mouth. Each one draws out more of the toxin.
Because he’s never been a replacement addiction.
He’s my cure.
We kiss slow and sweet for ages, salty tears mixing on our lips. I’m not sure who they belong to— me or him— it doesn’t matter because we’re falling into each other, making out like teenagers again, tongues massaging and hands mapping every inch of skin. I’m drifting through the clouds when he rolls me under him—
