“I did. Because I couldna stand tae not have ye for another second, another minute, another hour. And because that was what we both agreed tae. Ten years,” he said, his eyes as flat and unreadable as a blank page of parchment. “Ten years, and if we werena married, we’d marry each other. That was the deal we struck.”
“A deal with the devil,” she whispered. “I was a child when I made it.”
Lachlan’s chair clattered to the floor with a loudbangas he stood up.
She flinched both from the violent sound and the sudden anger swirling in the depths of his gaze.
“But ye were a woman when ye honored it,” he snarled, stepping over the fallen chair and around the edge of the table until the only thing that separated them was an invisible wall of vibrating fury. “Ye made a choice, Bry. I didna force ye.”
“I never claimed–”
“And then ye made another choice when ye walked away.” He leaned in close. So close that she smelled his scent, an achingly familiar combination of evergreen and peat. So close that she saw the flecks of gold surrounding his pupils. So close that the yearning deep inside of her was almost too strong to ignore.
“Aye,” he said huskily when her gaze betrayed her and went to his mouth. “The fire’s burning, Bry. It never went out.” His hands, impossibly gentle for how large they were, skimmed along the outside of her arms until they reached her wrists. He encircled the tiny bones, thumb and index finger easily overlapping. “Which means ye have one more choice tae make.”
Her heart beat like a wild thing inside of her chest. It thrashed against her ribcage, pounding against all of the measures she’d put in place to protect herself from exactly this. From falling back into his orbit, like a star spinning wildly through the galaxy only to become ensnared by the gravitational pull of a planet.
“I cannot.” With her eyes, with her heart, with all she had within her, she implored him to understand. To turn on his heel and walk out the same door he’d come in. To leave her to the life she’d made for herself. A life that wasn’t perfect. A life that fell far short of the one she’d dreamed of. That they’d dreamed of. But at least in this life…in this life, it didn’t hurt to breathe. “Wecannot. We tried, Lachlan. We did our best. And…and you weren’t the only person to make mistakes.”
It was the first time she’d acknowledged her wrongdoing.
The first time she’d admitted that some of the fault for their marriage crumbling was her own.
There was a sense of peace in that.
A relief of pressure that she hadn’t known she was holding.
But it wasn’t enough.
It would never be enough.
For they’d gone too far apart to pretend they could come back together now.
“Thank ye for saying that.” His thumbs rubbed light circles on her fluttering pulses. “We might have broke, Bry, but we’re not broken. I love ye. I havena stopped loving ye. Not for a bluidy moment.”
She was tempted–oh so tempted–to give him what he wanted. To rest her head in the middle of his hard chest and begin again. To let go of all past hurts and heartbreak. To take the easy way out.
But what hewantedwas not what sheneeded.
And the easiest path was rarely the best.
Slowly, steadily, she extricated herself from his grip. Took one step back, then another, and another, until the length of the room–and all the pain they’d caused each other–stood between them once again. An impenetrable wall that no chisel could break. “If you truly love me…then you’ll let me go.”
Chapter Six
Let her go?Let hergo?
Didn’t Brynne know that if Lachlan could, he would have?
He’d never liked pain with his pleasure.
If he had the ability to release himself from the spell she’d cast over him when he was but a boy of sixteen, he would have done it gladly. But while a man could live without a limb, he needed his heart. And if he let his Bry go, he’d be wrenching the organ straight out of his chest.
Yet he’d be damned if he begged for her on his bloody knees.
“I’m not keeping ye,” he said, gesturing at the door. “But I’m not leaving, either. Not until we’ve figured this out once and for all.”
“There is nothingtofigure.” Her hands went to her hips as temper glinted in her eyes. Temper he was glad to see, as he couldn’t abide her sadness…especially knowing he was the cause of it.
