But Adam wasn’t exactly a shining example of a gentleman!
It was their imperfections that made them perfect for each other, and if he was incapable of seeing that…if he was incapable of seeing that, then she wanted no part of him. Not even the delicious parts.
All right, maybe a few of the–
No, Eloise.
Bad, Eloise.
No biscuit for you, Eloise.
“Eloise, wait,” Adam called after her as she stomped away. “Damnit, I saidwait.”
Bristling, she whirled to face him, her curls–wild and still wet–lashing across her cheek. “I don’t have to listen to you!”
“Yes, by God, you do.” His strides swallowed up the space between them. He grabbed her by the arms, his countenance a mask of tortured frustration. “We have to stop running away from each other. If the past few weeks have proven anything, it’s that no matter where we go, we always find ourselves back here. Together. And damned if you aren’t the most enraging, exasperating,vexing–”
“You’ve made your point,” she cut in, glaring at him. “I’m the exact opposite of what you’re looking for.”
“Yes, you are,” he said. Then his face softened, and he gently brushed a tendril of hair behind her ear. “But maybe you’re what I needed to find. Eloise–”
“YOU BASTARD!” Out of nowhere, Perth came charging towards them with all the momentum of a loaded freight train barreling down the tracks. Eloise found herself thrown to the side as Adam and her brother-in-law collided.
While she bounced harmlessly on the grass, she saw Perth throw a punch and Adam block it before delivering a blow of his own that caught the duke on the side of his jaw. Perth staggered back, caught his balance, and then launched himself at Adam again. Cursing, growling, thumping, they fought their way to the pond and then fell into it with a giantsplash.
“Here,” Coming up from behind Eloise, Lenora draped a shawl over her shoulders and then sat beside her as they watched their men roll around in the water, the slippery mud making it difficult for either one to land a serious jab. “You’re practically naked.”
“Thank you.” Eloise tucked her knees up and gathered the shawl under chin. “Do you think they’ll seriously harm each other?”
Lenora sighed. “They’ll tire eventually, and aside from a few cuts and bruises, I’m sure they will be fine. It’syouI’m worried about, sweetling.”
Sweetling was what their mother used to call them, and hearing the tender endearment brought on a rush of unexpected tears.
“What’s this?” asked Lenora when Eloise tried–and failed–to disguise a sniffle. “Are you…are you crying? Is it Mr. St. Clair? I can guess what you’ve done, but was it not consensual? Did hehurtyou, Eloise? If he did–”
“No, no,” she said, swiping irritably at her damp cheeks. “He didn’t hurt me. And yes, it was consensual. It was…it was amazing. And I already know what you’re going to say, but I don’t care. I don’t care, because I’m not like you, or Bridget, or Annabel. I’m my own person and I don’twantto be who you want me to be. I never have. I…I realize that it’s been difficult to be my sister. I realize that your life, that all of your lives, would have been better, and easier, if I was never born. But I can’t help that. And I’m tired of being molded into something that I cannot be.”
“Wait.” Lenora grasped her hand and squeezed. “What?Never born…Eloise, what are you talking about?”
The tears began to flow unchecked. “Mother. I’m the reason that she died. The doctor told her not to have any other children, and then she had me, and I made her frail. I made her weak. I killed her, and then because of me, Father died as well. I’m the reason that Annabel had to cut her Season short, and I’m the reason why we’ve been in mourning, and I’m the reason why James left. None of us want to say it out loud, but he’s likely dead as well. And it’s my fault. It’sallmy fault.”
“Eloise Catherine Arabella Rosewood, you listen to me!” Lenora took hold of her shoulders and gave her a shake hard enough to rattle her teeth while in front of them Adam and Perth continued to grunt and thrash. “That’s hogwash. Complete and utter nonsense. Do you understand?”
A hard knot formed in the pit of her stomach. “I–”
“Weloveyou, Eloise. Mother and Father loved you. You were a miracle to them. Toallof us. You made our family complete. If I’ve done or said anything to make you believe otherwise, then I am sorry. The fault is mine. Not yours.” Lenora’s own eyes shone with tears as she threw her arms around Eloise and hugged her tight. “Mother was weak beforeIwas born. It’s simply the way that she was. And she could have listened to the doctor, but she didn’t want to. She chose not to, and that washerdecision. Her choice. Not yours. You didn’t cause her death, Eloise. You gave her a reason to live.”
Drawing a deep, shuddering breath, Eloise laid her head on her sister’s shoulder as grief and guilt coursed through her in equal measure…and then slowly, slowly began to dissipate, like fog lifting off a lake. “I wish they were still here.”
“I do, too.” Lenora rubbed her back in soothing circles, just as she’d done whenever Eloise was a child and sick with fever. “But we’re blessed to have one another. Five individuals that together make a whole. But some are more individual than others, and I’ve failed to take that into consideration. I’ll try to be better, Eloise. I’ll try todobetter.” She cleared her throat. “That being said…”
“You want to ask me about Adam.”
“Yes, yes I do. I’m sorry–”
Another loud splash turned both their heads towards the pond. Perth had his hands wrapped around Adam’s neck and was trying to pull him under the water, presumably to drown him. But with a guttural roar, Adam drove his fist into Perth’s abdomen and while he was doubled over, managed to switch their positions so thathewas now the drowner instead of the drownee.
“Boys will be boys,” Lenora said mildly. “Unless they can be grown men rolling about like warthogs in the middle of rut season.”
