‘Of course.’
‘That magic that you did earlier.’ He drops his voice. ‘I saw the windows coated with ice. Is that from our parents? Something they could do?’
Of all the questions he could have asked, this is probably the one I wanted the least.
‘No,’ I admit, wanting to start the relationship with whatever truths I can offer. ‘I am truly not sure what it is. But I intend to find out.’
Chapter 9
William begrudgingly allows Jonas to accompany him back to Artur’s to pack his things, meaning I am left to spend my first full day with my sister in our family home. It should have been a joyous occasion, one spent wandering through the different rooms, recalling memories and moments from our childhood and talking about our parents. Discussing our next steps, our future. But she has already claimed a future as a wife and mother, and I have no idea what mine contains, though I doubt it will be a long one if I can’t get my powers under control.
The way William mentioned the ice on the window causes me to shudder. Does he know that what he saw was enough to get me killed? Surely he must? So is that why he mentioned it, to show he has a secret of mine, too? After all, that is the Wrohelm way. But the way he questioned, it felt more intrigued than threatening.
Did Kay even notice what I did? Does she realise what dangers I’m harbouring within my veins?
Either way, I need to get answers, which is why I start in our family library.
The last time I was here, there were shelves that I wasn’t allowed to touch. Ancient tomes stored behind glass or on the topmost levels thatmy parents promised they would look through with me when I was old enough.
Well, I’m old enough now.
As I reach up and take the first one down, I can’t help but think how different it would be to have them here with me now, flicking through these pages together. A knot rises in my throat and I swallow it down with effort.
Wallowing won’t get me any answers. Moving forward is all I can do.
I work my way methodically, scanning through the pages as quickly as I can, and I’m more than a little relieved when Benny turns up.
‘Hey, how did it go with the newlyweds?’ he asks. ‘I couldn’t hear any creaking beds upstairs, so …’
‘Urgh. Don’t.’ I gag. ‘Jonas isn’t here, thank the Gods. Here, make yourself useful.’
I toss him one of the books, and he catches it despite the terrible throw.
‘What am I looking for?’
‘Anything that might be useful. You know, to do with my ice powers. I figure I might as well start here before I head to the High Hold library and bother Caroline.’
The scribe’s name causes a deep throb behind my ribs. I know I need to see her. Now that I’m out of the Retterheld, there’s really no excuse not to – apart from the guilt, that is.
I’m still here, but the woman she loves is dead. Because of me. The knowledge eats at me.
Benny immediately tosses the book aside and grabs another. With his power of being able to see the truth, see to the heart of things, I don’t know why I even bothered to start reading myself. It’s easier having him do it, with his speed-reading ability. And no doubt more accurate, too.
‘Anything?’ I ask impatiently as he moves on to his fourth book.
‘Well, I’ve got an interesting blood vow here, if you want to stop people from ever spilling a secret, and that first book had a whole section of myths and folklore, including Myrkrs, krakens and vätte.’
‘Krakens?’ I reply. ‘In a myths section?’
Krakens are very real, as the Retterheld taught me, but I guess there was a time when people weren’t so sure. ‘What does it say about them?’
He shrugs. ‘Big, scary … if there’s one in the water, you should stay out of it.’
‘Yeah, well, we already know all that,’ I snort.
I try not to remember waking up in bed after my kraken encounter, try not to remember the love and heat between Kyor and me. Lies. All lies. ‘I guess we just keep reading.’
‘Bywe…’ he teases.
