‘You’re sure?’
‘I am.’ She nods.
I don’t want to press the matter now, but I make a mental note to check in with her in the morning to ensure she slept okay. ‘In that case, you should eat and rest.’
A frown creases her brow. ‘Should I not wait up for Lady Acacia?’ she asks.
I sigh. Kay was spitting nails at me hours ago. If she were going to return home, I suspect she would have done so by now. No doubt she has instead returned to her fiancé’s house.
The thought makes me shudder.
‘I don’t think that will be necessary,’ I reply.
‘I’ll fix her room up all the same,’ Summer says decisively. ‘That way it will be ready when she returns.’
Somehow, I have managed to land myself the hardest-working maid in all of Wrohelm. As she moves towards the door, I find myself filled with gratitude not to be rattling around in this massive house alone, even if I have to pay for the privilege.
‘Thank you, Summer.’
She turns back and curtseys. ‘M’lady.’
‘You don’t need to do that,’ I say. ‘You don’t need to curtsey to me. Don’t need to call me “m’lady”. A few moons ago I lived in the slums. I was noone. Nothing.’
She looks at me fiercely. ‘No one is ever nothing.’ She curtseys again and leaves, shutting the door behind her.
Well, that’s me told.
I crawl under the covers. The soft, oversized mattress is little comfort in comparison to the loneliness that permeates every part of my being, but it is soft and warm.
Finally alone, I let myselffeel.
As tears clog my eyes, my fingers stretch out onto the cold, empty side of the bed. In the safety of the darkness, I allow myself to imagine Kyor there beside me, the soft skin of his lips brushing against me as he whispers in my ear.
It’s so real that I can almost smell his vanilla scent sweeping through the room.
But it’s not real. Won’t ever be real again.
I close my eyes and surrender to tears as I remember how wonderful it was when I believed he loved me. When I believed that the gifting would solve all my problems and that the future would be easy.
When I wake,it is with a cramp across my stomach and dryness in my throat. As I lie there, memories of the day before surface, but not the good ones. Not my powers being restored to me. Not stepping across the threshold of my home after years spent living in the slums. No, the memories that arise are the ones that cause my chest to tighten, as if crushing my heart might ease the pain. If only it were that simple.
I know it’s weak, allowing myself to be claimed as a victim of my grief, and yet I feel it happening. Feel the anger surging through me. I shift my position, only for my eyes to fall on the mantlepiece, onto a small carving of a dire wolf. I don’t know who it belonged to, whether it was mine or Kay’s or William’s, but it doesn’t matter. All I can think of now is my siblings. My pregnant, betrothed sister who will never live the life I fought for with blood, sweat, and friends’ lives to get for her, and my brother who can never know his true family.
A primal howl rips from my lungs, consumed with such magic thatit tears through the wall in front of me. Literally. The crack is sharp but resonant as the brick splits and shifts.
Fuck!
‘No … no!’ I jump up, trying to stop the motion, but it’s too late. The crack fills with ice and extends downwards towards the window. My breath hitches, seizing inside me as I pray to the Gods it doesn’t bring the entire wall down, but it continues, though it is slowing and decreasing in force until, thankfully, it stops a few inches from the glass.
I drop down onto the bed, trembling. ‘What the fuck did I just do?’ From nearly killing Jonas to now this? My unwanted ice magic is far from gone, and these wild flare-ups are a whole different level of dangerous.
As I stare at the destruction I’ve caused, I can feel the way it’s draining the heat from the room. There’s no way this is a type of power I can allow anyone in the High Hold to learn about.
‘M’lady?’ Summer’s voice calls from outside the room. ‘Is everything okay?’
The door handle twists and I dart across the room, blocking the door before she can step inside.
‘I heard a noise,’ the maid says through the door.
