“I had a little help.”
“Oh? From who?”
His tongue runs along his lower lip as he grins. Shrugs. “This girl.”
I’m aware that there are other people in this room. A lot of them. But it doesn’t feel like it. Not with Penn looking at me like that. He seems like he’s in a trance, too, until some faraway noise starts to register, a tapping, and we both snap to attention.
Penn looks past me, and I turn to where Mac stands on a chair in the center of the room, knocking his beer glass with a spoon. They must’ve checked his megaphone at the door.
“Speech,” he yells, pointing to Penn. “Speech! Speech!”
Everyone cheers and I face Penn again, my pulse still too loud, and too fast. He’s already looking at me.
“I have to go,” he rasps.
“Go,” I say, grinning. “Your fans are waiting.”
His eyes stay fixed on me. “Find me after. Okay?”
I nod, my heart lodged in my throat as he walks away.
Almost as soon as he’s gone, Bridget’s taken his place, her arm looped through mine. Next comes Ryan, who knocks into me and grins. “Hell of a party,” he tells me.
I give him a shaky smile back, still unmoored.
I’ve got a clear view of Penn as he accepts a microphone from one of the servers. He stands in the middle of the room, so handsome and confident, looking every bit himself as he tucks a hand into his pocket and grins.
“Thank you so much for being here,” he says. “If you’ve been around Lakeville for a while, then you know this isn’t the first—or even the thirty-first—business I’ve tried to build here.” Everyone laughs. “And you also know that I wasn’t exactly a straight-A student, or even a hard worker. Unless you count pumping a keg as hard work.” He pauses, his smile fading into a thoughtful expression. “For a long time, I thought maybe I didn’t have much to offer, except for that—trying to give people a good time. But I’ve learned, fairly recently, that you’re more than what you do. And I’ve felt, firsthand, what it’s like to have someone look out for you, for no other reason than the fact that they believe in you.”
At last, his eyes find mine, and my heart can’t expand quickly enough to leave room for all the feelings blooming wide open in my chest.
“That’s what I want PennPals to bring to Lakeville,” he continues. “Connection, and support. That’s what I have to offer, andwhat this community’s already given to me. Along with a couple teenage misdemeanors we can discuss at the afterparty.” He raises his glass, and everyone follows suit. “Here’s to taking care of each other.”
Ryan whoops, circling his fist in the air.
Bridget clutches her chest. “I didn’t know Penn had that in him,” she whispers.
“I did,” I say, and she smiles.
Penn doesn’t often get embarrassed, but he does when Mac and Theo lift him up on their shoulders like he’s still their star pitcher, and I desperately want to point out the chandelier hanging, like, six inches from his head, but I don’t. I want Penn to have his moment. I want him to feel loved and celebrated for being exactly who he is.
Which is the only reason I manage to survive the next two hours. It’s torture every time Penn brushes past me, saying nothing but everything when he catches my eye. Even as we’re unable to continue our conversation, he finds every excuse to bring me drinks, check in with whoever I’m talking to, touch my arm, my hip, my waist.
His smug, self-satisfied stare has grown on me. It might actually be my favorite thing.
The party winds down around eleven. Theo’s ordered the final, gazillionth round of shots, Penn’s been cornered by Mac and his enthusiastic pickleball team, and Bridget’s already left with Ethan, who arrived late but won me over instantly with how he gazed at my best friend, starry-eyed, like a kid on Christmas morning. It’s what I’ve always wanted for her: someone who sees she’s a gift.
I find Ryan sitting at a table near the water dispenser, responsibly hydrating.
“Look at you,” I say with a laugh as I drop into the chair beside him. “It’s a miracle. I’ve finally rubbed off. You’re a changed man.”
He grins. “Everybody’s going to Curly’s for an afterparty, but I’ve got early meetings tomorrow. Are you ready to get out of here?”
“Not yet. I—I have to say goodbye to Penn.”
Ryan glances at the crowded bar, then back at me. His brow furrows, and I know this is it. It’s time to tell him. Penn and I are tipping into new territory. The change I’ve been afraid to stir up is already here.
“About Penn and me,” I start, taking a breath.
