“I said I’m fine,” I say, just a little more harshly than I mean to.
Ian and Lila exchange a look, having a conversation without words. I know that later, they’ll most likely talk about this conversation, about poor, pitiful Abby and everything she’s still dealing with. It makes me want to go somewhere and hide, but there’s nowheretohide. Not here. Not when I’m trapped on their couch with no space for myself.
I wipe my mouth with my napkin. “I’m going to go to the bathroom.”
“Sure,” Ian says with a nod.
I can see that same pity in his eyes, like he’s worried about me. And I’m grateful for him, I really am. I’m happy that he cares. It’s just that it feels sostiflingsometimes. It’s like he still thinks I’m a kid who needs saving. Like I’m not capable of taking care of myself.
And maybe that’s the result of his own guilt. Maybe because of all the years we lost when I was younger, Ian thinks he has to try twice as hard now to protect me. I love him for that, I really do, but I don’t need him to be my parent. I just need him to be my brother.
It makes me feel like I can’t fucking breathe sometimes.
I close the door behind me in the bathroom—Lila and Ian’s bathroom, because they don’t even have a spare—gripping the edge of the sink as I heave a sigh. The thoughts going through my head are irrational and probably not at all smart, but the idea of sitting through another dinner where my brother and his girlfriend look at me like I’m made of glass makes my skin crawl, as ungrateful as that makes me sound. The alternative is a very stupid idea, most likely, but given that I can’t exactly afford a whole new place while I wait for mine to be fixed…I don’t have a lot of other options.
Before I can change my mind, I pull out my phone, searching for a contact whose number I’ve never used.
Me:did you mean what you said about Ian’s old room?
I stare at the message thread for an entire minute before I see that he’s replying, holding my breath as I wait for his answer to come through.
Idiot:it’s yours if you want it
I peer up in the mirror at my dark circles and the weary set of my mouth, thinking about how hurt Ian and Lila will be if I tell them I’m going to stay somewhere else. Then I think about the way they look at me when they think I don’t notice, like I’m a sad puppy they want to take care of.
I’m probably really going to regret this before it’s all over.
Me:how soon can I move in?
Six
Jack
I’m still slightly in shockthat this is happening.
Sure, there’s physical evidence that Abby actuallydidtake me up on my offer—there’s the text in my phone, the call that came after to work out the details, and most importantly, there’s her stuff currently being brought into my apartment—but none of these make it easier to believe.
“Feels like just yesterday we were movingyouout to live in bliss withmysister,” I sigh, patting Ian’s shoulder as he sets a box down in his old room.
He narrows his eyes. “I swear to God, if this is some ploy…”
“Does that sound like me?” I flutter my eyes innocently. “I’m just being a Good Samaritan.”
“Good Samaritan my ass,” he mutters. He crosses his arms over his chest. “Why does she wanna move in here, anyway? She can barely stand you.” He gives me an apologetic look. “No offense.”
“None taken,” I tell him. “It’s just how we flirt, after all.”
Ian rolls his eyes. “Yeah, right. At least I don’t have to worry aboutthat,” he laughs. “I think pigs would fly before Abby would hook up with you.”
“Should I be offended by that?”
“Maybe,” Ian says. “But we both know you aren’t.”
“Ah, you know me. I like a challenge.”
Ian grimaces, then levels me with a flat stare. “Listen, all jokes aside…Abby has been through a lot. She needs some stability right now after all the shit our dad pulled.”
Wow, they really are babying the shit out of her.
