Page 188 of A Reign of Chromes & Shadows

“I want you to know that I know you’re not a bad guy. And it wasn’t your words that hurt me before. It was my own stupidity. Because I know… you know… that I still love you. And I can’t hide that from myself, let alone from you.”

Hope flared; blinding bright in his chest. For one suspended moment, Rain let himself feel it.

Then Jay continued.

“But I’m glad we agree that we’re better off as friends. If you still want to be my friend, that is.”

The hope shattered.

It didn’t fade.

It didn’t dim.

It broke; violently, completely, leaving Rain hollow.

He stepped back slowly, straightening, ignoring the crushing ache in his chest. Jay felt the shift instantly; the emptiness that filled the space between them, the cold air where warmth had been seconds before.

Both of them crossed their arms over their chests at the same time; a mirrored gesture of self-protection neither of them acknowledged.

“Of course,” Rain forced out, the words scraping up his throat like they’d been dragged over broken glass. His voice sounded steady; infuriatingly steady, even though inside he felt like he was splintering apart.

“I will always be here for you, Jay. That’s a promise I will never break. No matter how much chaos surrounds me or how many responsibilities I’m juggling, I will always make time for you.”

He swallowed hard, the ache in his chest tightening.

“You will always be my first love, after all.”

He tried to smile; a soft, wistful curve of his lips but the sadness in his eyes betrayed him. It was impossible to hide. Not from Jay. Not from himself.

A single tear slipped down Jay’s cheek.

Rain’s breath caught.

Before he could think, he reached out and brushed it away with the gentlest touch, the kind of touch that belonged to lovers, not exes, not friends, not whatever they were now.

The moment Rain’s fingers grazed his skin, Jay broke.

A sob tore out of him; raw, unrestrained, ripped straight from the centre of his chest. He slapped his hands over his face, ashamed, shoulders curling inward as if he could fold himself out of existence.

It was as though the entire week had been one long, desperate attempt to outrun the truth and now it had finally caught him.

Jay turned away, instinctively trying to flee the moment, flee the vulnerability, flee Rain.

But Rain couldn’t let him.

He stepped forward and pulled Jay into a firm, grounding embrace. Jay collapsed into him, his body shaking with grief, his fingers clutching at Rain’s shirt like he was afraid Rain might disappear if he let go.

Rain held him tighter.

Unbeknownst to him, his energetic shield activated; snapping into place like armour. It shut down his empathic ability entirely, protecting him from the tidal wave of Jay’s emotions. For the first time in his life, Rain could hold someone who was breaking without breaking with them.

It steadied him.

Anchored him.

Allowed him to be strong even as his own heart cracked open.

They stayed like that for a long time; long enough for Jay’s sobs to soften, long enough for his breathing to settle into a fragile rhythm. Jay didn’t pull away. If anything, he clung tighter, as though Rain was the only thing keeping him upright.