Sarai stared at the sky, lost in thought as they rode to the Grains Guild’s horreum.
Having never been there, Méherre had only been able to open a Bridge as far as Aelius’s vigile station, where they had stolen two horses and ridden like the wind. She stared at the familiar wooden gates crawling close on the horizon. By all the gods, to what purpose was a god tormenting their city?
“You’re quiet.” Méherre nudged her mount to trot beside hers.
“I’m lost,” Sarai admitted. “I wish I had more in the way of power to halt Noceo and this god. But I can barely get people to take me seriously let alone the divine.”
Méherre shot her a look that she wasn’t used to receiving. Kind but also implying that she wasn’t very bright. “Noceo and the Order came for you,” she said slowly. They could have ignored you when you positioned yourself as a target, but they drove you straight to a Hearing instead.” Méherre spread her hands wide at Sarai’s bewildered shrug. “You really don’t see it? They only sought to take away your social capital because youhadsome. Ever thought that you might be focusing too much on the few who dislike you and not the multitude who couldn’t care less either way?”
Sarai nearly lost her grip on the reins.
Méherre raised her brows meaningfully. “That’s why Noceo keeps offering you power, so he can take advantage of your name beside his. Yesterday’s display earned him more fear than it did respect. Your allegiance would place a thumb on the scale in his favor.”
Something stuck in the back of Sarai’s mind. She opened her mouth when Méherre spoke again.
“Freedom without power is a curse for people like us.” She examined the sleet-covered farmhouses on either side of the road. Icicles hung from the eaves, dripping. “I saw you recognize it too in Komis after the strike.”
“People like us?”
“People who want to set the world right,” Méherre clarified. “You care a great deal. A dangerous thing for a woman with power. You ran yourself ragged around Edessa.”
Sarai’s brow furrowed. “Méherre, how do know so much about—”
“Anything you’d like me to examine with Cassandane? She’s the only one of us wandering in a daze about what to do, so I thought I’d help her after leaving you here.”
Sarai lost her train of thought. “Perhaps a search of the Hall of Records too? Anek may as well be on their own there with Harion.”
Méherre snorted. “Nothing between his ears, and he does get so touchy about it.”
Sarai studied the deep downturn to her lips, the weariness lining her face. “Thank you, truly. You must have imagined there would be more to the capital than a couple of tired Tetrarchs, Petitors, and several hundred vigiles trying to hold the country together.”
“Not precisely. But you needn’t worry.” Méherre’s smile was that of a woman who had known too much compromise and now took no quarter. “I’ve only ever wanted to see this through.”
Sarai registered the ring of truth in the words as they drew up before the gates into the horreum and bid Méherre farewell.
The cold howled around her, striking invisible knives through her thick birrus to penetrate skin as she circled the horreum. Her footsteps plunged deep into fresh flurries, sinking to the ankle as her mind turned to the unique question of Dalvia.
To Kadra’s knowledge, Dalvia had been an only child, and after the death of her parents, she’d been left to depend on the mercy of Kadra’sClan. But try as she did, Sarai couldn’t fathom why the woman hadn’t left Noceo if she abhorred what he was doing.
Her feet sank into a footprint. A frisson of warning ran down her spine upon sighting a second trail in the snow.Shit. Who else was here?
Holding her breath, she eased backward, stepping in her own footprints until she had come back the way she’d entered. Turning, she froze at Noceo standing before her.
Hands behind his back, he stared at her in equal shock, then surveyed her scarred skin with the arrogance of a man who believed his judgment crucial to the existence of most. “You could pass for the Xaromand Desert. Cracked earth.”
A few words and he reduced her to so little.Worthless. She ground her teeth at the memory. “About to imbibe more stimulants and fight a god?”
Noceo scowled. “Where’s Drenevan?”
“Not here.” She was suddenly heartily thankful that he had stopped by Aoran Tower first. “Where’s Dalvia?”
“Who knows? Still upset at your defeat?”
Sarai watched him as one would a blackstripe bear. Her breath fogged out in the cold. “I don’t know where you get the idea that you’re doing any good, but nothing will change with you around. At least there’s hope with the Tetrarchy, flawed as it is.”
“Hope. Illusion.” Noceo kicked at a tuft of snow. “You haven’t seen enough to know the difference.”
An exhausted laugh escaped her, tinged with a bitterness that took a moment to ebb off. “I have. Enough to know the difference between the illusion of power and hope of it.” She performed a pointed once-over of his quaking hand. “Drugs wearing off?”
