I was determined to not make this about me. This wasn’t about my old demons. This was about getting Ettie home. I focused on Sal’s warm grip on my thigh and the crickets that sang as night approached.
An hour later, we had them pretty toasted. Stu and Sal were talking like old friends while my mother was content to smoke in silence. Stu was talking up a storm about how he’d lived in Nevada for years before moving out to Eugene. He wanted to hear all about Sal’s club because he’d been in one himself years before. Sal obliged him, in gesture at least, without giving anything away.
“Where’s the money?” my mother finally demanded as though she’d been holding the question in all night, which she probably had.
“Word is that Parker’s callin’ a hit on you both,” Sal lied calmly as my mother sucked in her breath. “But he’s got somethin’ our club wants. We’ve got a lot of muscle after him. If you know where he is, we can take the mark off your head,” he said as he shrugged, as though it were no big thing to him.
“So, you don’t have anything for us,” my mother deduced, and I rolled my eyes at her greedy, one-track mind.
Sal’s eyes grew fierce as he leaned in to draw his point home. “Did you not fuckin’ hear me, woman? If I don’t find Parker, you’re dead. You won’t need money when you’re six feet under.”
Stu sighed wearily. “I have a number from way back when, not sure if it’s still good, and a few places I know he hangs out, or used to anyway.”
My heart soared with hope at this news.
“Good,” Sal nodded. “Get the number,” he ordered. “Almost outta here, babe,” he murmured low in my ear.
I nodded, clasping my hands in my lap and beyond ready to have this over with.
My mother narrowed her eyes at me as she blew a stream of smoke through her nostrils. “You’re just itchin’ to get outta here. It’s just like old times,” she snorted.
“Pretty much,” I retorted as Stu returned with a piece of paper.
“Don’t know if it’ll help, but that’s all I got,” he shrugged.
Sal nodded, taking the paper wordlessly, and rising from the table. He extended his hand to me and I took it gratefully. “Wish I could say it’s been a pleasure,” Sal grunted and I bit back a smile. He winked at me and squeezed my hand.
Moments later, we were back on Sal’s bike, shooting through the trailer park and out from the dense canopy of trees. I took my first real breath since we’d arrived and closed my eyes, welcoming the wind to clear it all away.
Sal pulled us into a motel and I shuddered at the thought of having to stay in this town a second longer. But, I knew he couldn’t possibly drive back without some rest and frankly, my ass needed a break.
“We’ll get outta here at first light, Birdie,” he assured me as soon as we’d checked into our sparse motel room.
I nodded, feeling completely wasted. It had been harder than I thought to spend time with my ma, harder still to do it in the place I’d never wanted to return to, ever.
“I gotta call this information into the guys. I also wanna check on Soph. You wanna shower?” he offered, his dark eyes assessing me carefully.
I nodded and moved woodenly to the small bag I’d packed.
“Babe, first light. Promise,” he said again.
“Yeah, okay,” I agreed, quietly heading to the shower and shutting the door with a resounding click.
I took a long, hot shower, trying to wash away the day. I tried to focus on the silver lining. We’d gotten the information we’d come for.
I just hoped like hell that it was good.
I stood there thinking about Ettie and what kind of nightmare she was probably in right that very moment. I felt so helpless, the feeling made more so by memories of my childhood swirling in my head.
The first sob escaped, reverberating off the mint green shower walls. I was too tired to hold it in, too overwhelmed. I rested my forehead against the tile and let the despondency take me.
And then he was there.
His strong arms turned me gently so my cheek rested on his firm chest. He wrapped his arms around me, securing me as close to his body as he could get me, and rocked us slowly as the warm water fell over us.
We didn’t speak; words weren’t needed as our bodies said it all. We stood there until the water started to turn cold. He turned off the shower and toweled me off while guiding me to the bed. We crawled in naked, and I immediately pulled him over me.
“Sal, I need you,” my voice rasped.
