“Christ, bunch of fucking pansies,” Travis complained.
“Just you wait, bud,” Sid replied, slapping him on the shoulder. “I’ll try not to say I told you so when it happens to you.”
“Right,” Travis replied sarcastically.
I knew that despite his reservations, when my brother fell, he’d fall hard.
It was after dark by the time the last box had been brought in. We all sat outside enjoying the backyard and devouring the pizza I’d ordered.
“Ma called,” Travis told me when he came to sit by my side as Sid sat on the other.
“Oh?” I replied tonelessly. “Did she spare a breath to ask anything about you?”
He shrugged, taking a swig from his beer bottle. “Not really.”
I looked over at him, waiting for him to say more, despite knowing he wouldn’t.
“It took me a while to realize they were the reason I had a hard time getting close to people,” I shared. Sid’s hand slid over my thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze. I didn’t even realize he’d been listening as I continued. “You ever think it might be the same for you?”
Travis looked out at the darkened backyard, seeming to consider my question. “I think we all process things in different ways. For me—well, I had you to focus on. To take care of. I don’t think their apathy affected me the same way. It may have made me harder, more reserved, but that got me where I am today. No sense looking back.”
I placed my hand over Sid’s. “I couldn’t agree more.”
****
Sid and I sat side by side on the back deck long after our friends had departed. Trixie was still busy sniffing around, marking her territory as though she could somehow defend it if push came to shove.
“The only home I’ve ever known has been with you,” I marveled out of nowhere as the thought sprang into my mind. “I thought at first it was just our place in Silverlake with Piper and Cade, and now this, but even Brad’s felt like home to some extent.” I turned to look at him, taking in his handsome face in the muted light. “I think I’d feel at home anywhere with you.”
He pulled me deeper into his side, kissing my temple.
I groaned. “You wanted me to share more and now I’ve become so sappy, it’s nauseating.”
“I won’t tell anyone,” he stage whispered with a grin. “I like you sappy. It’s cute as hell. So is your snarky side and your clumsy forgetful side. And that voice. Damn, when you sing….” He trailed off reverently.
I nudged him with my knee. “Now who’s sappy?”
He shrugged. “I’ll be a sap for you. I’ll wear that shit like a badge of honor after everything we’ve been through.”
I nodded in agreement. “I could live without another gun pointed at me ever again.”
He turned to me, his blue eyes serious. “I’ll die before it happens again.”
I snuggled into his side. I looked out at our new backyard, imagining the future we’d build in the confines of the walls behind us and underneath the sky above. “No talk of dying. Forever, remember?”
“Forever,” he agreed with a smile.
EPILOGUE
One Month Later
Ipaced our living room for the hundredth time as Trixie sat on the couch watching me with her large dark eyes. She’d paced with me for the first fifty laps, but had gotten tired at some point.
Sid had been gone for three weeks; he’d accepted a contract just a week after we’d moved into our house.
This was the test we’d both known was coming. It was time to start our real lives together, which, along with the bliss of building our future, also meant at times he’d be taken away from me.
That last night had stayed with me every day, every moment. He’d made love to me until I could barely move before he pressed his forehead to mine. “We’ve been through hell, baby.” His voice had been insistent through the darkness. “We’re stronger than iron. We’ve got this, yeah? Don’t forget that.”
