“You didn’t lie? Are you delusional?” I demanded. “You told me you had to work late.”
“I did,” he insisted. “That shit tonight was work.”
“A lie by omission is just as bad.” I shook my head. “I’m done.”
“It wasn’t a lie, by omission or otherwise,” he growled.
“You really believe that,” I murmured in shock. “You think not mentioning an event you were the keynote speaker at, that most men would invite their woman to, isn’t a lie.” I sighed sadly.
He stared back at me a flicker of doubt shining in his dark eyes.
“Are you ashamed of me? Did you want to take someone else?” I asked, unable to quell my dark curiosity.
“No,” he barked, appearing incensed by the very suggestion. “Fuck.” He rubbed at the back of his neck, appearing stressed. He came to sit on the edge of my bed. “It wasn’t something I thought through,” he admitted. “Thinking about it now, I guess maybe I wanted to shield you from it.”
I eyed him warily. “From what?”
“From that part of my work. I don’t like being in the spotlight, and I think you’d like it even less. I didn’t want to force that on you, not yet. And I think a part of me didn’t want to share you. What we have is the most precious thing I’d ever had. I wanted to keep it for me, for just a little while longer.”
“I may not like attention,” I allowed. “But I would have done just about anything for you. Seeing you speak would have made up for any awkwardness I may have felt. I could have gotten used to that part of your world. I’m stronger than you think.”
“You’re the strongest woman I’ve ever met,” he countered. “And why the fuck are you speaking in past tense?”
I took a deep breath, having to force some of the most painful words I’d ever uttered. “Because I meant it, Travis. I’ve shared more with you than I have with anyone. I forced myself to let you in, even when it was hard as hell. But you’re either unwilling or unable to do the same. I can’t do it anymore. We’re done.”
“We aren’t,” he bit out.
“You don’t get to decide this.” I shook my head. “I’m not yours. Not anymore.”
“The hell you aren’t!” he exclaimed, shoving off the bed in a move so abrupt it pushed the furniture back an inch. “You’ve been mine since that first night, when you leaned into me, tripping over your own two feet, trusting me to catch you. You’re the most real thing in my world. I love you, Em.”
“You had to say that now?” I cried. “When we’re over?”
“We’re not fucking over!” he bellowed, before visibly working to collect himself. “Look, I admit, I made a mistake. I should have told you about tonight. I knew you had a big day today, that you’d be tired. I didn’t want you to feel obligated to come with me. I wanted you to be able to come home and get some rest.”
The fact that that made perfect sense frustrated me even more. I threw up my hands. “So say that!”
“I should have,” he admitted, sitting once again on the edge of my bed. His large hand reached out, clasping my leg over the comforter. “I was trying to protect you, not hurt you. Swear it, Em. That’s the last thing I ever want to do. I’ll take you to every fucking event you want to come to. I’ll yell into the microphone that you’re my girl. That’s what I wanted to do tonight. I missed you like hell. I left early, wanting to catch you before you fell asleep. Coming home and finding the house empty—I never want to feel that way again, Em.”
I blinked back tears, unsure what to say.
“I love you, Emerly,” he repeated, his eyes smoldering with intensity.
I forced myself not to be drawn to him, to the words that made my heart pound with hope. “You need to let me into your life,” I rasped. “I don’t like all the secrets. I know there’s information about Roy, about Mabel that you’re not telling me. I’ve been through a hell of a lot worse than this, Travis. I can handle it,” I told him firmly. “What I can’t handle is having the one man I thought I could trust—lie to me,” I whispered hoarsely as tears slid down my cheeks.
“You can trust me,” he murmured, reaching out to wipe at my wet cheeks. “I promise, I’ll be better about letting you in. I wasn’t trying to keep you out in the first place. I’m just on the same autopilot I’ve been in for thirty-one years. I need a little practice.” He broke into a sad smile. “I’d do anything for you. I’m in love with you, Em.”
Hearing the words again left me uttering the only response possible. “I love you, too,” I murmured.
He let out a shuddering sigh a second before he pulled me into his lap, taking my mouth in a fervent kiss. His tongue met mine in a frenzied duel as his hands stroked my hair before moving down my back, pulling me closer until it seemed his goal was melding us into one.
“I’m sorry, babe,” he rasped against my lips. “Don’t leave me again.” His big body shuddered. “I’ve been in too many life-or-death situations to count, starved in the jungle, outnumbered ten to one. But a tiny blonde has the power to fucking destroy me.” He pressed his forehead to mine. “Let’s get home.”
I pulled back, looking at him cautiously. “Do we have to? I just, I missed it here,” I admitted. “Is it still unsafe?”
He pulled back with a deep sigh. “Probably not,” he allowed. “But probably isn’t good enough, not when it comes to you.”
I nodded, trying not to look disappointed.
