Chapter 34
Ilet the hot water in Scarlet and Cole’s guest bath sluice over my blood-caked skin, trying like hell to wash the day away. I grimaced, watching as the water pooling at my feet turned brown from dried blood before swirling down the drain.
Scarlet had doted on me, making sure I had more water to drink before handing me everything I needed to wash up. Her house had felt so quiet without the kids but I was relieved they weren’t around to see me in such a state. I was sure I looked like some version of Carrie with the amount of blood covering me, but hadn’t looked in a mirror to confirm that theory.
My hands shook as I washed my hair, the adrenaline from the day waning and becoming mild shock. I gave up the task, instead collapsing unsteadily to the shower floor, sitting on the cool surface and pulling my knees up close to my body. I shuddered as I fought to hold myself together.
I’d come so close to losing everything. The relief of it all and the lingering fear was a heady mix to grapple with.
I noticed distractedly when the water turned cool but I wasn’t ready to stand up yet. Instead, I was content to clasp my knees in close to my body, rocking slightly, knowing I must look half-mad.
“Jill?” Cal’s voice sounded from the other side of the shower curtain a moment before he pulled it open. “Oh, babe.” His rasp of concern hit me hard as he climbed into the shower, clothes and all, and sat behind me, pulling me into his body.
I remained in a ball as he held me close, rocking us in a soothing sway. “I th-thought you’d be a while longer.” My teeth chattered as I shuddered in his arms. The tears I’d been holding in streamed down my cheeks in an unrelenting onslaught. His presence made me feel safe enough to let go. I didn’t have to be strong anymore, not right now. He could be strong for both of us.
His chin rested on the top of my head. “I was, but then watching you walk away didn’t feel right. I know you, babe, and I knew you weren’t all right, but you put up a hell of a front. I was impressed. We all were.”
That front of mine was a skill I’d honed over the years, but all my pretenses collapsed when it came to him.
“I should feel so happy. It’s finally over. I got to face him—to show him that I’m not the weak person he tried to turn me into,” I tried to explain. “I hate that he can still upset me. That he came so close to Mason.” I shuddered again. “I hate that he had so much power over me for so long. Hell, I was kidnapped today, I watched two men die, and seeing him, hands tied behind his back lying on the floor, was still far more terrifying.” My breath hitched. “I know it’s over but it doesn’t feel quite real yet.”
Cal squeezed me tight. “I can guarantee that he didn’t know you were scared. I sure as hell didn’t. You told that motherfucker off. I had to fight myself to let you do it—didn’t feel right to have you in the same room as him, but I knew you needed it. I knew you could handle yourself. I also knew you’d feel the effects. It’s why I’m here now. I want to pick up your pieces, baby. I’ll hold you together when you fall apart.”
My breath caught at his beautiful words and I pushed off his body so I could look him in the eye. “You get all my pieces,” I murmured with a smile, referring back to the conversation we’d had when we’d first gotten together.
He offered a soft smile in return as his hand lifted to tuck my wet hair behind my ear. “You get all my pieces too. And you helped me find some I didn’t even know I was missing.”
I bit my lip and nodded.
“Now.” He looked up with a wince at the cold water falling around us. “What do you say we get changed and head home?”
“Sounds perfect,” I agreed wholeheartedly as he stood up and helped me to do the same. He pulled me close, kissing me soundly before looking down at his drenched clothes.
“Guess I’ll have to borrow something from Cole.”
I laughed hoarsely, swiping at my eyes. “I think you’ll have to,” I agreed. “Thank you,” I added, my hands on his chest as I looked up at him. It felt totally inadequate but it was all I could manage.
“Only thanks I need is you for the rest of my life. And after today, looks like I’ll be getting my gratitude very soon.” The intent was clear in his tone.
Hell yes. There wasn’t anything I wanted more. “Like, tomorrow soon?” I asked hopefully.
His gaze turned soft as he smiled down at me, his hands on my hips.
I melted into his cold chest, trying to keep the shivers at bay, wishing we could stay like this for just a little bit longer.
He squeezed me tight once more, dropping a kiss to the top of my head before stepping away. “Come on, baby. Let’s get you home.”
After borrowing some clothes from Scar and Cole, we headed home. The house felt so empty when we walked inside. Ry and Piper were on their way over with the kids. In the meantime, the absence of their lovable chaos was evident.
It was obvious when Cal spoke that he felt the same way. “I can’t believe I used to live with this quiet,” he muttered to himself as we walked through the house to our room, where I promptly burrowed under the covers. “I didn’t used to even think about it. But now, it’s deafening, the silence.”
“Yeah,” I agreed quietly.
He sat on the edge of the bed, watching me intently. “I have to go back to the club, babe. Got some unfinished business there. I’ll probably be late.”
Tim. Tim was his unfinished business.
“You gonna be okay?” he asked.
