“There was an accident. They both passed; I…I survived.”Truth. But one that kept my deepest and most shameful secret hidden. I survived. But my memories didn’t.
“I’m sorry they passed.” His eyes remained softened, but then, to my surprise, his lips curved up, showing the start of a smile. Then he said, “I should havedefinitelystarted with a different first question.”
“It’s not your fault,” I replied quietly.
“So, you’re from Kalnar, then. That’s west of here, right?”
“Yes, two days’ ride west. Do you want to see it?”
“You want to go back there?”
I let out a small chuckle. “No, I mean from up here. Come, I’ll show you.”
I moved towards the window and Aegir followed. I leaned forward, my belly grazing the blemished sill, and I eased the window open a little farther. I was both surprised and displeased at myself for never noticing how breathtaking the view wasfrom up here at this hour. The sky turned to gloam as the sun gracefully set behind everything else, behind the dunes. A blend of red, orange, and yellow painted the purple sky.
I pointed out the window. “There, right there. Do you see that tower? It looks like it’s emerging from in between those two big dunes.”
He leaned himself out, his right hand resting on the windowsill; he placed the other on my lower back. My skin came to life at his light touch, like a moonflower unfurling its delicate petals at the moonlight’s embrace. I still remembered how it had felt—when he’d placed his hands on my waist and my back when we danced in Dunehaven. And how he held me from around my belly for long hours on our ride back. But this—his palm on the naked skin of my back—was too much. I tried to appear as nonchalant as physically possible.
“Yes, I see it,” he replied.
“Thatis the high tower of Kalnar. The Orphanage of Dunes is right behind it.”
He dipped his head and looked at me with what appeared to be a very warm smile. His eyes, I noticed, seemed greener than usual, being so close to his green tunic.
“I’m glad you survived.”
His soft words fell over me like a gentle caress, but I could only bring myself to nod, my lips pursed, then continued gazing at the tower. I could not always say the same—I admit that there were some hard days when I wished I had joined them. Others, when I thought about finally lifting that tile.
Aegir pointed at the high tower—no, not at the tower, but at the invisible orphanage behind it—and said, “So, I’m very curious now, was it right there where you became this clever, or was it where you became this cruel?”
I suppressed the start of a smile and snapped my head towards him, narrowing my eyes. I swore that not one wordfaltered as I asked him rather too quickly, “Why do you ask? Oh, let me guess, is it perhaps because you’re interested in visiting, to give a guest teaching yourself? ‘Endless ways to become a brute,’ you would call it.”
He barked out a belly laugh, his hand leaving my back.Finally. My skin was impetuously embracing the combination of warmth and cool. I either needed more of that or nothing at all.
“I attended the teachings every day; that may have made me both clever and cruel,” I added, looking at him over the top of my nose.
“Good for me, then. Did you…enjoy your time there?”
Oh,never mind—now that he’d placed his hand on the small of my back once more, I decided that I’d rather he kept it there than nothing at all.
“I cannot say I hated it. Sand Priestess Selmira became the closest thing I had to a mother. I enjoyed my time with her, and after the teachings, I spent most of my afternoons at the stable, playing with the horses and reading.”
“You had horses there as well?”
“Mmhmm. Linda, a sweetheart, and Nutmeg, secretly a sweetheart.”
“And so you spent your time reading and taking care of the horses. Why am I not surprised?” We both chuckled at that. “You didn’t get along well with the other children?”
“I—I did. We talked in between teachings or when we were in our dorm. But…but they always came and went in twos or threes. It’s unusual here, not to have siblings. They always had each other in the end. I had my horses and my books.” His thumb gently caressed my skin in small circles. It sent a soft blanket of warmth that extended to my lower belly. My heart rate spiked—I had to break the touch.
Moving away from the window allowed me a glimpse of our reflection in the tall mirror. In that tiny little second, I managedto observe how we looked next to each other. I noticed that the top of my head was about level with his shoulders, and the size of my waist was probably half of his, smaller even.
Aegir followed me back to the dining table. I didn’t offer any help as he plated and served us a bit of everything. The beef was beyond anything I had ever tasted—it melted in my mouth, and each side was perfectly seasoned. Pity I couldn’t give Merti a personal compliment.
“The food is delicious,” I said. “Andthis—I had no idea it tasted this good.”
“You mean the wine?” he asked, lifting a brow.
