Linc put a hand on his shoulder.“Help me with the setup first, and then we’ll see.We have a routine, but we’ll fit you in there.It might just take us a while.Be patient with us, okay?”
Marcus, heat rising to his cheeks, looked at Linc with big eyes and nodded.That was yet another sight I wouldn’t have minded watching for hours.
Dom rolled his right shoulder.“Twister was a good start though.We’re definitely going to do that again.”
I got to my feet as well.I had this feeling deep inside of me—elation and pure joy to be able to live this moment.I never wanted it to end, would give anything for more of the same.All of us were happy, and at least for tonight, there was no immediate worry, not even work tomorrow.
Perhaps all the evenings the three of us had shared before today, even the best ones, had been incomplete without us even noticing.But now we had our mate, and colors were brighter, scents more pronounced.
“Can I hug you?”I asked Marcus.
He looked at me funny, but then he nodded.I wrapped my arms around him and held him, allowing his scent to fill my nose.
I had no idea how this was possible, I just knew that I was lucky.Just as carefully as Dom had, I rubbed my chin over the top of Marcus’s head before deciding to do something potentially disastrous.
“Marcus, don’t freak out, but I love you.You don’t have to say anything back, and I don’t expect you to reciprocate.Just had to tell you.Don’t freak out.”
The others did.I heard them, felt their eyes on us, but they didn’t say anything, they just stood and listened instead.
Marcus didn’t say anything back, but how he acted told me something.At first, his shoulders tensed, but after a second, he relaxed into the hug again, even tightened his hold on me.He didn’t pull away.
He stayed and let me hold him, and it was such a small thing, yet so incredibly big.I was sure I’d be grinning all through the sing-along.
28
The party wasn’t anything like I’d imagined at all.I’d had fun, so much fun.Ell had made a spicy plantain and rice dish—seriously, those three were fancy when it came to food—and there’d been enough coffee cake for breakfast the next morning too.
I kind of settled into a routine after that day.I’d always been pretty disciplined when it came to my work, but I’d mostly been alone at my place, and for the past couple of years, I’d fitted my schedule entirely around Steven’s.
Here, people fit their schedule around me.Or rather, everyone arranged their schedules to work together.
Ell had his shifts, usually the early ones, but he said he did later ones too sometimes.Dom was totally flexible and made sure not to do noisy stuff when I was lounging on the couch with my laptop.Linc stuck to his office most of the time, which was kind of nice as he had extra room and didn’t mind me doing the training with Naja there.It was also a good place for quiet coworking, and despite me thinking otherwise at first, he didn’t try to distract me with lovey-dovey stuff at all.
Something about the new job was definitely tiring me out though.Pretty much after the first day, I found myself gravitating to the couch or the cuddle puddle to take breaks.In fact, I’d started napping.It was embarrassing.It made me feel old.I was totally blaming the damn fresh air.It didn’t help that Dom had picked up on me turning into a sleepy ass fast, and he got me snacks and tea ready as soon as my naps were over.
Really, it was so embarrassing.
On top of that, while there was still another week or so to go, my vacation was coming to an end.Once it was over, I’d have to make a decision about whether I wanted to stay here.
I’d been staring at my laptop while working in Linc’s office for a good ten minutes thinking about that.The words wouldn’t come as I went round and round in my head about…about leaving.
Did I want to leave?My plans for not running headfirst into a new relationship felt stale and half-forgotten, like a New Year’s resolution in July.Linc, Dom, and Ell made everything simple.They talked stuff through, they said nice things, and they were clearly in touch with their emotions, hugging and touching each other as much as they hugged and touched me.They had no moods that made me feel like I had to walk on eggshells around them.
All of that was refreshing.Going back to my apartment by myself was unappealing in comparison.The apartment was cold and dark.Not literally—I had functioning lights and central heating.Also a new security lock now.But in my imagination, this little place out in the middle of nowhere was like a hearth, warm and inviting me to come in from the cold and lonely outside.My apartment, the place that should’ve been home, had become distant and full of memories of a relationship that had led nowhere.
I bit my nail.Was it really going to be as easy as saying I’d stay?Or was this like going on a beach vacation where everything was lights and fun, only to discover after moving to that place that living there was pretty much as difficult as life anywhere else?
Not to mention, what was I going to do about the polycule situation?
Interestingly, no one had ever pressured me into sex.It was almost the opposite.Everyone was casually intimate with each other—with me as much as each other—and that was just so new to me.
I made the swivel chair roll almost into the trash bin next to the desk when a hand landed on my shoulder.
Linc made a surprised noise.“Sorry, honey.I talked to you, but you were zoned out.Is everything okay?”
“Yes, totally.”I looked around, hoping to find an excuse on my screen, but I’d not gotten anything done.“I just, uh…”
Linc had this really kind, annoyingly pretty smile.“Want to take a break?An early nap can’t hurt.”
