Chapter 45
Aurora
The warm air of the café surrounds me as I tie the server's apron around my hips and make a knot.
"Well, well, look who decided to work today," Vivienne comments as I enter the café.
Sighing, I slide onto one of the stools in front of the counter with hanging lamps and rest my head on my hand. "I'm sorry," I say remorsefully.
My colleague reaches for a cloth. "You can't just leave in the middle of your shift without letting anyone know what's going on."
Leaving without a word, thinking I'm doing the right thing when it's wrong. That seems to be my specialty.
"It was an emergency." I sound like a dumb cow, and that's exactly what I am.
Sighing, Vivienne cleans the counter. "Who was the guy?"
"Nobody." The word escapes my mouth conspicuously hurried.
"But it didn't look like that." She stops working and gazes intently at me. "Do you have problems?"
Vehemently, I shake my head. "It'll be alright." A shadow spreads inside me.
Suddenly, she leans over the counter toward me and takes hold of my hands. "I know we're just coworkers," she starts cautiously, and I immediately feel worse. She's invited me to do things with her so many times, and I've always kept my distance.
"I..." I try to explain but don't know how to put it into words.
I have to deal with my problems alone? I can't burden you with my baggage?
For a moment, Vivienne raises the corners of her mouth. "Your reserve is one thing, but you can't just leave everything and run, do you understand? Your colleagues rely on you."
Guilty, I lower my eyelids. "You did the counter and tables."
What the hell is wrong with me?
I'm a terrible person. A liar. And—as I now realize—a control freak.
Oh God, why didn't I just let Maxime decide for himself back then how to handle the truth? Even yesterday, I couldn't manage to tell him everything. Why is it so hard for me to let go of control?
"How can I make it right?" There's a plea in my voice.
She lifts her shoulders with a compassionate look. "It's already happened."
"I'll take over your shift today," I suggest. I can't keep making mistakes that can't be fixed. "And tomorrow, if you want."
A sad smile flickers across her face. "That's not necessary." She takes hold of my hands and squeezes them tightly. "Just tell me what's going on, Aurora. I'm here for you. Let me help you."
Letting someone help me, I repeat in my mind, and it dawns on me that this could be the root of my problem. And I realize that, back then, I not only hurt Maxime deeply but also someone else.
I look at Vivienne sadly. "Can I ask you something?"
"Of course." Her warm smile gives me courage.
"Imagine a friend who hasn't spoken to you in over four years contacts you again. How would you react?" I look at her expectantly.
"Am I angry with her?" she asks, pushing her lower lip forward.
"You were at an event with her. She claimed she needed to use the restroom." I clench my teeth. "And she never showed up again."
