"Father…" She breathes heavily. "Since he left the estate, everything has gotten much worse. Yesterday, he was so out of it that he didn't even recognize my two girls."
My God. I was sure a change of scenery would help him leave the past behind. But it seems to have had the opposite effect. "How could that happen?"
"You've seen him. He hasn't been himself for a long time. And the sale of the estate dealt him the final blow." Suddenly, she sounds distant. As if she needs to switch off her emotions to be able to talk about it at all. "I'm afraid he'll…"
She doesn't have to say it, and I don't want to hear it. "Fuck."
Unconsciously, I clench my fist so tightly that my fingernails dig into my palms. My fear of my own emotions has destroyed everything. The estate, my family, and - worst of all - my chance for an entirely new life with Hanna. It's all connected, and only now am I able to see it.
"If there were a way to undo it…" My God, if only that were possible. I would do it. Because Hanna's dream is my dream too. I've never seen it as clearly as I do right now.
"There isn't," Camilla interrupts. "We have to look forward." An infinite sadness echoes in her words. "You too, Vico."
Every fiber of my being resists. Because if I do that, I see days filled with emptiness that not even the adrenaline rush of cliff diving can fill. Since I've been back, I've tried my best to pick up where I left off, but now I realize that I don't even want that life back.
I want Hanna. Despite all the obstacles standing between us, just one day with her would be worth more than a lifetime without her.
There must be a way to show her how serious my feelings are for her. And that I would be willing to face my greatest fear for her. But how can I prove to her that my heart beats only for her?
"Vico? Are you still there?" Camilla asks.
I mumble absentmindedly because my mind is somewhere else.
An idea is forming inside me. With each passing second, it becomes clearer. A picture builds up in my mind's eye and eventually turns into a solid plan. An exciting tingle floods my body. Suddenly, I know exactly what I have to do next. And it certainly isn't jumping off a cliff to win some meaningless competition.
