“Jake’s welcome to leave anytime. I know he has numerous responsibilities he’s missing by being here,” my mom replies. She takes a tiny bite of her salad before saying, “I’d like you to stay through the rest of the week and head home on Friday. You can help me clean the house and do another large grocery store run before you go. I’ll plan on driving myself to therapy starting tomorrow.”
It’s finally happening. I have a timetable for returning to my real life. Being able to control my day-to-day. Having access to my entire closet. Cook in my kitchen and eat whatever I want. Drink wine and gossip with my best friend. A surgeof excitement builds within me until I look at Jake, and my enthusiasm for going back to Chicago dissipates.
Going home means leaving Jake.
The two of us will no longer be in the same city. Separated by seven hours, assuming he’s not traveling. Although we’ve discussed how to make a long-distance relationship work, the reality of it happening suddenly has me more on edge than I anticipated. I thought we’d have more time together before this day would come.
“I’ll plan on leaving when Kate does,” Jake says, his eyes locked on my mom. “I want to make sure both of you have what you need before I leave. Plus, it’ll give me time to finish the few outstanding projects needed to get the house on the market.”
The rest of dinner goes by in a blur as my mom chats about the latest town gossip and her plans for the summer. I occasionally smile or throw in a comment to act like I’m listening when my mind is spiraling about what this means for Jake and me.
As soon as my mom gets up from the table to put her dishes in the sink, Jake makes eye contact with me. He mouths, “We’ll be okay,” with a tentative smile.
I nod silently back at him, hoping he’s right.
“What are we going to do, Jake?” I ask as soon as I walk into his house and find him sitting on the living room couch. It took longer than normal before my mom called it a night, leaving me stewing for two hours after dinner as I fought to keep my emotions bottled up. And now they’re ready to come pouring out. Pretty sure I looked panic-stricken and ready to burst into tears the moment I walked through the front door.
Jake gets up from the couch and pulls me into his arms, holding me tightly. “It’s going to be okay, Kate. We knew this was coming. It’s just happening earlier than we planned,” he murmurs, rubbing his hand on my back in a soothing motion. “I’ve already made some calls and have a couple of ideas.”
I choke out a small sob, my chest heaving as the tears I’ve held back for hours finally break free. I’ve felt more like myself in the past two weeks than I have in my entire life, and the thought of losing that feeling—losinghim—even if it’s temporary and only physical, makes my heart ache in a way I didn’t know possible.
Jake takes my hand, guiding me over to the couch. He wipes away my tears, staring deeply into my eyes with such strength and conviction. “Do you want to talk about how you’re feeling?”
I shake my head, knowing that expressing the fears I have won’t make them go away. The best solution is to make actions to combat them. Ways to prove to myself that we can make it through this separation. That all the pain will be worth it in the end.
“Okay,” he replies, cupping my face and pressing a sweet kiss to my lips. “I’ve been waiting all night to kiss you. To hold you in my arms and reassure you that we’ll get through this together. Because now that I have you, Kate…I’m never letting you go.” He kisses me again, his tongue swiping inside my mouth, fueling the constant burning desire I have for him. I could spend hours kissing him and it wouldn’t be enough. A lifetime wouldn’t be enough.
He breaks away and drops his forehead to mine as our chests heave against one another. I want nothing more than to crawl into bed with him and let him worship my body until I forget what’s about to happen. Effectively erasing tonight’s dinner conversation from my mind. But that won’t solve our problems.
“What are we going to do, Jake?”
He blows out a deep breath, lightly kisses my forehead, and sits back on the couch to look at me. “Your mom took me by surprise today. I knew we were getting closer, but I thought we would at least have a few more weeks.” He runs one of his hands through his tousled hair, messing up the strands in a way that makes it look even better than it did a couple of minutes ago.
“Same,” I reply, wiping away my remaining tears with the sleeve of my oversized sweatshirt. “I thought we’d have more time to spend together before…”
“Me, too,” he agrees, dragging a hand over his face and exhaling. “After dinner, I made some calls to see what flexibility I have in my schedule and what arrangements might be possible. Jason was pretty adamant that he needed me back two months ago, but eventually calmed down to be somewhat reasonable. At least, for him.”
A small chuckle escapes my lips. Everything Jake has told me about Jason paints him as a workaholic with unrealistic expectations—the polar opposite of Jake. It’s hard to fathom how they’ve worked together for so long without driving each other insane.
“Although this won’t be a long-term solution, I’d like to go to Chicago with you, if that’s okay,” he says with a hint of trepidation in his voice. He takes my hand in his, rubbing his thumb in gentle circles on my palm. “Would that be okay? I can probably stay for a month or two.”
“Are you kidding me? It would be amazing!” I shout, practically leaping on top of him until I’m straddling him on the couch.
“Glad to see you like the idea,” he replies, running his hands up my thighs. “Max is finding us a few rental options to consider. I’m not ready to share you with anyone yet, not even Chelsi.”
I shake my head and laugh. The feeling is definitely mutual. I want all the privacy in the world right now. For us to explore each other’s bodies and figure out what this could become.
He drags a fingertip along the waistband of my leggings, dipping underneath ever so slightly, instantly setting my core ablaze. “Now that we’ve dealt with tonight’s unexpected drama, I’d like to get back on track with my original plan.” He leans forward, brushing his lips along the side of my face and nipping at my earlobe. “Taking you to my bed and showing you exactly how good we are together.”
“Yes, please,” I whimper, arching into his touch.
He stands and takes my hand, leading me toward his bedroom. And then it hits me.
I’ve completely fallen for this man, and I don’t want to ever let him go.
fifty
“The two ofyou are so freaking cute, it’s disgusting,” Chelsi declares, rolling her eyes and taking a large drink of her wine as we sit around the table in my condo. Chelsi insisted that the three of us have dinner together and wanted to make sure she could interrogate Jake as part of her best friend responsibilities. So far, she’s been on her best behavior and hasn’t said anything too outrageous. “Is this how it’s going to be? Both of you spend all night eye fucking each other while we eat?”
