“There’s a quiet spot near the video games. Let’s go over there and talk,” Jake says, placing his hand on the small of my back as we walk to the dimly lit area.
I lean against the wall next to a claw machine filled with stuffed animals that were trendy five or more years ago. Talk about the world’s worst location for confessing my fears about how I stack up against other women.
Jake stands in front of me, gazing into my eyes and making it almost impossible to concentrate. “What’s bothering you? And don’t pretend it’s nothing because I know better. I knowyou.”
I exhale loudly, almost obnoxiously, because telling him this is the last thing I want to do tonight.Or ever. But if I want a chance with him, I don’t have a choice.
“You and Hannah bickering reminded me of high school.”
He nods, urging me to go on.
“I started thinking about all the girls you dated in high school. The women you’ve dated since. How women watch you. Eye fuck you.” I tilt my head to the side, biting the inside of my cheek. “I’m not like any of them. I’m so different from anyone you’ve dated. It makes me worried that?—”
“I’m going to stop you right there. None of those other women holds a candle to you. No other woman in this world is as beautiful as you are,” Jake says in a low voice, caging me in between his arms and lifting my chin gently. “I don’t want any other woman. I only want you.”
I inhale sharply.
“I can’t control how other women look at me. Can’t stop them from staring or apparently ‘eye fucking’ me. But I don’t notice any of them. None of them captures my attention like you do.” He leans in closer until his lips are brushing against my ear. “I haven’t looked at another woman since I realized how I feel about you.”
I gasp. “But that means…” My mind flashes back to the dinner we had at the Mexican restaurant. The countless women who watched him, the ones he swore he didn’t see.
“I’ve been falling for you for a while. Everything changed for me a couple of weeks after I got back in town.”
I squeeze my eyes shut, pressing my lips together tightly, preparing to ask the next question that could make or break everything. The one that’s even more relevant, given the timing. My eyes open, meeting his intense gaze. “How can you be sure this isn’t grief talking? How can you know these feelings for me aren’t caught up in your mom’s death?” I hold my breath, fighting back tears as I watch him for a sign. Anything to help me determine whether these feelings are temporary.
“I’m very serious about wanting us to be together. This isn’t the grief talking,” he replies in a serious tone, his face filled with sincerity. “I’ve been attending therapy virtually at least once a week since my mom died. That’s how I know what I feel for you isn’t tied to grief. That it’s extremely real. You can talk to my therapist if you want.”
“You’ve talked to your therapist about me?” I blink rapidly, completely thrown by this piece of information.
“At length. She knows everything about you and us.” He takes a deep breath, adjusting his position until he is supporting himself against the wall on one arm, and his other hand slowly slides up my body until it lands on my waist. “How I feel about you is real. And I’m pretty sure you feel it, too.”
I nod silently.
His grip on my waist tightens, igniting a fire between my legs. Making me long for his touch. His kiss.All of him.
“Fuck. I can’t wait until you’re ready to be mine. Have your lips against my skin. It’ll be the best fucking day of my life, Kate.” His smoldering gaze does nothing to dampen the raging inferno inside me. “We should go back to the group before I lose all self-control.” He pushes off the wall, staring at me with longing before we start heading back to the lane.
This is real.
He wants me. For me. No one else.
Now all I have to do is find the courage to jump into his arms.
Brandon’s voice startles me from my thoughts. “Everything okay?” he asks, glancing from me to Jake and back again. “You were gone for a while.”
“Everything’s fine,” Jake replies smoothly, picking up his beer and taking a long drink without breaking eye contact with me. “Kate had to get an answer to a pressing question before she could enjoy the evening. It’s all good now.”
“Thanks for unleashing the monster in Dylan,” Hannah says, a hint of frustration in her voice. “He threw two spares for the two of you and has now convinced himself the ball is magical. He’s currently trying to negotiate buying the crappy bowling ball from the manager. Completely convinced it’s the first step toward going pro.” Hannah sits across from us, shaking her head. “I sure do love him, but the things that this man believes.”
“The heart wants what the heart wants, Hannah,” Jake replies, eyes locked intently on me, as if we’re the only two people in the room. “No one can help who they fall in love with, nor how fast they fall.”
Talk about knocking the wind out of my lungs and sending my heart soaring. The rest of the night is a complete blur; my mind focused solely on what Jake meant by that comment.
forty-one
“Did you have fun bowling?”Hannah asks. When she asked me to meet her for lunch at the Mexican restaurant, I didn’t think anything of it, but the arch in her eyebrows and her sly smile make me think she’s up to something.
“Yeah. Didn’t you?” I dip a chip in salsa and pop it into my mouth. There’s something about homemade tortilla chips that hits differently than anything store-bought. It’s one of the reasons this place is my favorite restaurant in town. My favorite Mexican restaurantanywhere.
