She looks over at Hayden. He's standing back, close to the door, giving us space. But she sees him and something shifts in her expression. Something warm and certain, like recognizing something she'd been half expecting to find.
"Hayden Crawford," she says quietly.
He moves closer to the other side of the bed. "Hey, Mrs. B."
She looks at him for a long moment. Then at me, then back at him, in that way mothers have of reading an entire story of two people standing in the same room.
"Together?" she asks.
I feel my throat tighten. "Yeah," I say. "We’re together."
Her eyes close briefly, as if she is relieved about it. When they open again they're bright, too bright, and she squeezes my hand with those thin fingers.
"Come here," she says to Hayden.
He leans in slightly.
She reaches out with her other hand, slowly, and she puts it over his where it rests on the bed rail. He lets her. He doesn't move.
"Promise me," she says. Quietly for just the three of us. "Promise me you will keep her happy."
Hayden looks at her for a moment, then he turns his hand over under hers, gently, so he's holding it instead.
"There's nothing I won't do to make her smile," he says. Low and even and completely without hesitation. "No need to worry, Mrs. B."
She exhales.
It's such a small sound. But it carries everything in it, relief and something that looks a lot like peace, like a thing she's been holding for a long time has finally happened.
She looks between us.
The happiness on her face right now, is making me so happy.
"I knew," she says softly, looking at me. "I always knew, Livvy. Even when—" She stops. Swallows. "Even when we moved, I knew you’d be together.."
I can't speak. I take in a deep breath while mom smiles at Hayden, and then out of nowhere the machine changes pitch without warning.
One second it's the steady rhythm I've been listening to since we walked in, in the background, constant and reassuring. The next it's something else. Something urgent and climbing and wrong.
My mom's hand goes tight around mine.
Then loose.
"Mom—"
The door opens. Two nurses, then a third, and they're moving fast and talking medical words I don’t understand, but they do. Someone is asking us to step back and someone else is bringing equipment and the room is suddenly full of people andnoise. I'm standing completely still in the middle of it trying to understand what is happening.
"Miss, I need you to wait outside?—"
"No." The word comes out of me before I've decided to say it. "No, I'm not?—"
"Miss—"
"That's my mother." My voice is someone else's right now. High and strange and not quite working properly. "That's my mother, I'm not going outside?—"
I feel hands on my arms. They’re firm and not unkind, turning me toward the door.
"We need the space, we're going to take care of her, I just need you to wait outside, please."
