“At least I only have to do it once,” I say.
“No more kids for you?”
I shake my head. “After one deadbeat ran out on me, I’m good.”
“Not all guys are deadbeats, dear. There are some good ones.”
I snort a laugh. “When I find one, I’ll be sure to find out if he is.”
Except…I think I’ve already found one of the good ones. Even though I can’t tell anyone. Does that really mean he’s one of the good ones?
Yes. Just because my father wouldn’t think so, doesn’t mean Sam isn’t the perfect guy for me. I wish I could tell him that, but I don’t want to scare him off. This thing between us still feels too new. Even though I’ve told him things about myself that I haven’t told anyone before.
“Hey. Can one of you run breakfast out to the barn?” Rex interrupts the two of us.
“Mind if I take it?” I ask Reenie. “I need some fresh air.”
“You know he’ll be okay, right?”
I give her a halfhearted smile. “When will I be okay? Pre-K today, college tomorrow.”
Reenie pats my cheek. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, dear. Still plenty of time left between now and then.”
I grab the box of food and give her a weak smile. “I’ll try.”
Shouldering open the back door, I walk the well-worn path to the barn. The cool breeze blowing helps my frayed nerves, but even the thought of seeing Sam doesn’t lift my spirits as much as I would hope.
The barn doors are wide open as I make my way through the aisle toward the office.
“Knock, knock.” The door is already open with Sam sitting at his desk. “Got your breakfast order.”
Sam looks up with a smile on his face. “Thanks for bringing it over.”
“Why’d it have to be me today?” I set it down on his desk.
“Do I need an excuse to see you?”
Sam gets up and rounds the desk, coming to stand in front of me. Even with his ass resting on the desk, he’s still a head taller than I am.
“You made it seem important.”
Sam brushes his fingers along my jaw. It’s the smallest touch but helps soothe me in ways I didn’t anticipate.
“How are you doing?”
“I’m fine, why?”
“For real, Joey. I know today is Max’s first day at school.”
“God.” I bury my head in his chest, trying to quell the tears from falling once again. I don’t care if anyone is around. Right now, all I need is comfort. “Will it get easier?”
It takes a minute before big hands come to rest on my back. In his office, we’re hidden away. For the time being at least.
“A little bit. Until they get older. But you have a long time before then. But when he gets home and tells you all about his day, it’ll help.”
“What if the other kids are mean to him?” I ask.
“Then we’ll have a class field trip up here and I’ll make the other kids like him.”
