“I feel like I failed her. It was hard to talk to anyone about Casie.”
“Tell me then. If you want. About your wife.”
“You really want me to?” I ask.
“Yes. She was a part of your life. There’s no need to pretend she wasn’t.”
I wish I had another drink. It might make this a bit easier to start. I’ve never been the relationship type. It was easier to lock my heart up and throw away the key after Casie died. But being here with Joey right now makes it easy to tear down the walls I built to protect myself.
“She had the best laugh. I loved hearing it. No matter what was going on, she could always make me smile with it.”
Joey’s knuckles brush over my bare chest. I realize how touch starved I am as Joey’s hands trail a path up and down my chest. How little I’ve opened myself up to others over the years.
The softness of her fingers makes it easy to keep talking.
“She was also born to be a mother. Kind of like you. The two of you are naturals.”
“I hope Max thinks so.” Worry lines twist her forehead. “I always worry if I’m doing enough for him. Hell, I’m still saving to fix my junker of a car. It’s not like I can give him much.”
“I can safely say kids don’t need that much aside from a parent who loves them and shows up. It took me a while to show up again for Lennox.”
“But you’re doing it now. That counts. You could have let her go, but you didn’t.”
“I’m glad she didn’t let me go.”
“You’re a hard guy to let go.”
“Oh, yeah?” I brush my fingers over her cheek.
The blanket slips down when she cups my jaw. Her own hands are soft as she traces every feature on my face. My eyes shut, memorizing her touch. It’s like it’s soothing every broken part of me. The parts that shut me off to love all those years ago.
“You have a big heart, Sam. You’re kind and you put others first. You make me feel seen when not many people do.”
“Joey.” I thread my fingers through her hair and pull her close. My lips ghost over hers. “I see you. Every part of you.”
“Even though my life is messy?”
“Even the messy parts. You’re so damn magnetic, that you’re impossible to ignore, darlin’.”
“Messy, magnetic, and impossible to ignore. Should that be my catch phrase?”
I kiss her. Slow and tender, I pour everything I’m feeling for her into this kiss. “As long as I’m the only one you’re drawing in.”
She gives me a gentle smile. “Yeah, Sam. You’re the only one I want.”
“Good. You might have caught me off guard, Joey, but you’re the only one I want too.”
I show her that when I carry her back to bed and slowly slide back into her. It’s gentle and so damn sweet that when we come together, a realization hits me.
I’m so far gone for Joey that I don’t know how this will end in anything but heartbreak.
I’m fucking screwed.
Chapter Seventeen
SAM
Sunlight pours into the bedroom. Fuck. Why did I forget to close the curtains last night? Stretching out, the bed next to me is cold.
