“What nights are training?”
“Tuesday and Thursday, and Dean said we could come and use the gym anytime we want. He’s got this program all planned out, and it’s based on what he learned being a SEAL. Did you know only around twenty percent of candidates make it through BUD/s? That’s the SEAL induction program, and it’s the hardest in the world.”
I pause with a plate halfway to the dishwasher. I haven’t heard Kieren this enthusiastic about anything since he got his high-tech gaming setup.
“You’re really into this, huh?”
“You should see this video, Mom.” He reaches for his phone, and I slide the plate into the dishwasher and dry my hands off on a cloth.
Kieren holds his phone out to me, and I come around to stand by him.
A video plays of men in military fatigues and white shirts. They’re lifting a boat over their heads and running along a beach. The shot changes, and they’re diving into the water.
“I want to be in the Navy, Mom. I want to be a SEAL.”
It’s been a long time since Kieren opened up to me like this. “That’s great that you’ve found something you want to do.”
He scrolls to another video. “But they only take the best of the best. I probably won’t make it.”
I hate hearing him talk like that.
“Hey, you can do anything you put your mind to.”
He shrugs. “Maybe. All these guys in the videos are ripped. I don’t think I can be like that. Not without a lot of training.”
“This is what you’ve been watching on your phone? Military training videos?”
“SEAL training videos,” he corrects me.
I put a hand over my heart and sigh in relief. “I thought you were watching manosphere videos.”
Kieren laughs. “Come on, Mom, give me some credit. Everyone knows those guys are losers.”
“Do they?”
“Yeah, Mom.” He shakes his head at me as if I’m the child and he’s explaining something really simple. “No one I know buys into that stuff.”
“Okay, good to know.”
I let out a long, slow breath. Maybe the next generation of men aren’t as lost as I fear, or at least not the one I’m responsible for.
The next evening, Kieren strides ahead of me to the training gym. In the light, it’s obvious it’s part of Jake’s Retreat. I missed the large sign in the dark, and the buildings I passed are offices, clinics, and accommodation units.
“You don’t have to come in,” Kieren says.
“I want to speak to Dean.” I need to apologize to him for my suspicion the other night, and the way I marched Kieren out of here. I also want to thank him for centering me yesterday.
Kieren heads into the gym and starts warming up with the other boys.
Dean is speaking with a couple of the boys, and his back is to me, giving me a chance to observe him. He speaks easily with the boys, and they hang on his every word. My heart flutters watching him. He’s confident and making a difference here, a real role model and exactly the kind of man Kieren needs in his life.
Perhaps the kind of man I need in my life too. I haven’t dated since Mark. I thought it was a conscious decision, but perhaps I just haven’t met anyone I want to date until now.
As if he can sense my eyes on him, Dean turns around, and his face lights up when he sees me, causing my stomach to do a flip.
He strides over and thankfully he’s wearing a top today, although the singlet barely covers his muscles. His arm muscles ripple as he walks, and the singlet does nothing to hide his hard chest, which glistens with a layer of sweat.
He knows how to work hard and get sweaty, and that thought has me crossing my legs and doing a weird jiggle, trying to dull the sudden ache between my thighs.
