“If you didn’t have to worry about jobs, where would you go first?”
I tipped my face up to the sky, already picturing it. “Glacier. Or maybe Zion. As long as there are miles of trails and sketchy cell service.” I smiled. “I want blisters and sore calves and to wake up in a tent that smells like dirt and pine needles.”
He huffed a quiet laugh. “That’s very specific.”
“I’ve thought about it a lot.” I shifted so I could see his profile. “I love places that make me feel like I’m a part of something bigger than me. You could come with me.”
“I’m not a hiker, but I’d go, even if you had to drag me up a mountain.”
“I wouldn’t have to drag you. I’d encourage you—there’s a difference.”
He snorted. “Encourage. Okay. I imagine there’d be a fair bit of glaring every time I tried to rest.”
I twisted in his lap to poke his ribs. “Fine. I might glare you up a mountain. But you’d secretly love it.”
Cormac’s mouth curved against my temple. “Probably would.”
“And you? If you could go anywhere…”
He was quiet for a moment, turning the idea over carefully. “I’d probably save my vacation days to tag along on your adventures.”
“Really? You don’t have anywhere you long to be?”
“Not really. I’m right where I want to be.”
My heart kicked. “With me?”
“Yeah.”
So simple. Right here, right now…it was all he wanted. When I thought about it, when it really came down to it, there was no place I’d rather be either.
I shifted again, turning fully toward him, my knees bracketing his hips under the water. My hands slid up his chest, water beading along his skin, then over his shoulders and around to his nape.
“That’s a really sweet thing to say. I’m really happy to be right here, right now, with you.” I dipped down to kiss his cheek. “You really can’t think of a place you want to go? I want to know.”
Humming, he ran his nose along my cheekbone. “There was a guy I became friends with during my hospitality program in college, Masa. He moved to Kyoto when we graduated and runs a hotel there. We’ve kept in touch, traded stories about guests. He came to visit the ranch last year and extended an open invitation. I’ve been thinking about it for a while. I just need to bite the bullet and make a plan.”
A sudden burst of grief struck me out of nowhere.
But when I thought about it, it wasn’t out of nowhere at all. I would always feel the loss of the years we’d missed out on, but hearing him share this small tidbit of his life—a life I could’ve been part of but chose something else instead—filled me with so much regret I didn’t know what to do with it. I should have known who Masa was. I should have been able to close my eyes and picture his face. But I’d never gotten to know Cormac’scollege friends. I’d willingly drifted away because it had been easier than keeping him close and losing him anyway.
There was so much about him I didn’t know, and I wanted it all.
“Wow, okay. Japan would be very cool. I never thought about going there, but if you want a travel buddy, I’m in.”
His brow quirked. “A buddy, huh?”
“A buddy, it turns out, I really like to kiss.”
His fingers wrapped around my hips, holding me close, and he tilted his head back, his eyes darting over my face. I smiled, and he returned it.
“You’re so handsome,” I murmured. “You always were, but you grew into a really beautiful man.”
His breath fell from his lips in a hard puff. “Yeah? You think so?”
“You have to know how handsome you are, Maccie.”
“All I care about is what you think.”
