I can’t ask him now. But, if not now, when? I glance down the empty hallway in case Emma is bearing down on us. This is even more awkward now that he’s seeing someone. I shouldn’t even ask. I’m only going to be humiliated. But… I have to try.
5
CARSON
Why was I hanging around outside the ladies’ room like a creeper?
I was waiting for my wife.
Ex-wife. Almost.
She’s fidgety, blinking a lot, not looking right at me. It shouldn’t be this awkward between us. We were together for over seven years. But I guess this is what happens when you split up. We were a couple and now we’re just… two people.
“I, uh…” She pauses. “Mynonnais turning ninety-nine this year.” She brushes her long bangs away from her eyes.
“Yeah. That’s amazing.” One corner of my mouth lifts as I think about Nonna and her give-no-fucks attitude.
“We’re having a birthday party for her,” Ayla goes on in a rush. “A family party. Big party.”
I nod.
“I… never told her we split up,” she says.
I cock my head, eyebrows pulling together. “Really? Why?”
“I just… I don’t… I knew it would make her unhappy. She really loved you.”
My mouth twists up a bit. “Yeah. I love her, too.”
She nods quickly. “Then maybe you’d be willing to… do something for her.”
“How so?”
She nibbles at her bottom lip and twists her fingers together. “Would you come to the party? And pretend we’re still together?”
My head jerks back.What?
“A lot of my family doesn’t even know,” she adds. “It would just be for, like a couple of days. And then… after her birthday, I’ll tell her.” She makes a face.
“That’s insane, Ayla.”
“I know! But I was hoping you would do it for her! I know you’re fond of her and this might be the last time you ever see her. Not to be morbid or anything, but she’sninety-nine. She actually said she can’t wait to see you, and this might be her last birthday.”
I cross my arms and regard her, trying to appear unmoved. “I can’t… you know what my schedule is like.”
“Yes, but the party is happening during the All-Star break. Unless…” She hesitates, catching her bottom lip between her teeth. “You have plans to go away. With Emma.”
I should have agreed to go to Aruba with the young guys. But I couldn’t handle spending a whole week with them while they discuss shrinking penises and who they want to smash or pass. And I obviously don’t have plans with Emma. Yet. Maybe. Whatever.
“I don’t have anything going on,” I say slowly. “But it’s still a bad idea. It’s lying.”
“It’s a white lie. It’s not hurting anyone. We’d be doing it for a good reason.”
She sounds anxious and beseeching and as usual, I’m finding it hard to say no to her. It was always that way. I’d give her whatever she wanted. Why do I still feel like I can’t deny her?
It’ll make her sad.
I’ve made her sad enough. I couldn’t fix her when she was broken and our marriage fell apart because of it. She lost everything she’d wanted and I’ll probably never forgive myself for that.
