Despite my reassurances that this was what David wanted, it was the first thing she said to him when he and Julia walked in the door a few hours later.
“Are you certain we shouldn’t wait for your father?” she asked before he’d even removed his coat.
I glanced behind him. The vicar wasn’t with him. He must be arriving separately.
“Yes,” David said firmly to her before turning to look at me. I’d chosen to wear the dress I’d worn when he’d pulled me out of the music room and into the corridor to kiss me. It was sentimental. David hadn’t said anything to make me think he wanted to be sentimental, but I couldn’t help it. If we were going to be married in name only and not even in a church, I wanted at least one thing to be special about this day.
Based on the way his eyes ran down my person and returned to my lips, he remembered exactly which dress this was.
Mama sniffed, unaware of the tension between my soon-to-be spouse and me. “I would be heartbroken if Anna married without me present.”
David turned to her. “My father will not be heartbroken. Even if he were, I wouldn’t inform him of or invite him to our wedding. We are estranged, and I’d like to keep it that way.”
Mama opened her mouth to perhaps ask another question but then must have thought better of it. She hadn’t been completely unaware of the kind of man Lord Murphy was on our last visit.
David waited just long enough to be certain she was satisfied and then turned back to me, his eyes once again raking over me. “Hello, Anna.”
“Hello.” My voice sounded strange in my ears, as if such mundane words didn’t have a place on my wedding day. I stepped toward Julia first. “Thank you for coming, Julia.” She looked nervous, as always, but a soft, hopeful smile toyed at her lips. I dropped a soft kiss on her cheek before stepping in front of David. “And thank you for coming as well.”
David’s lips curved up. “To my own wedding? Of course—” His sentence was cut short as I dropped a kiss on his cheek too. He was now clean-shaven, his clothing was impeccable, and even his eyes no longer looked tired. I stepped away, and with quick blink and a shortclearing of his throat, he continued, “Of course I would come to my own wedding.”
I took his hand and pulled him in to the drawing room. He followed quietly, and I didn’t dare look at his face. There was no privacy to be had in the cottage, Mama and Julia would not be far behind us, so I tugged him close when we were far enough away whispers would not be overheard. “I couldn’t tell Mama about all the details of our marriage. She knows we are marrying for my sake, but I didn’t tell her our marriage is likely to end. I want her to think you are happy to be marrying me.”
He pulled back, put a hand on each of my shoulders, and looked me in the eye. “Iamhappy to be marrying you.”
Ugh. This man. “You know what I mean,” I hissed back at him. “Did you have time to tell Julia?”
“Yes.”
“Oh.” Julia’s smile had looked genuine. Why would she be happy about the wedding if she knew it wasn’t going to be a true marriage? She’d warned me about taking advantage of his kindness; wasn’t that exactly what I was doing?
“Other than Julia and my brother, no one else will need to know until the time comes for you to leave. We will tell them then.”
Until the time comes for you to leave.It was a foregone conclusion in his mind. No matter what I did or how happy we might become, because of his father, he was certain I would either leave him or he would make me leave.
I bit my lip. “Do you think there is any chance that day might never come?” I asked softly.
David sighed heavily. “Even if it doesn’t ...” He shook his head. “I don’t want you to think that way. If you tire of a half marriage, you may leave at any point. I will pay whatever it takes to have the marriage annulled, and you can find a man who is free to love you fully. I don’t want you to stay with me if you are unhappy.”
All my certainty of his devotion to me wavered.
We should have talked more about this. We should have made time for it. But pushing off the wedding now would be rash. The vicar and two families were on their way here to witness it. And for what? David’s certainty on the subject wasn’t something I was going to be able to change over the course of a conversation, and even if he never changed his mind, marrying him remained my best option.
Another knock sounded at the door, and a few seconds later, Mr. and Mrs. Mortensen came into the drawing room, followed by Mama and Julia. They rushed over to us, hugging us both profusely. David laughed at their exuberance.
Mrs. Mortensen grabbed my hands and pulled me in one more time for a quick embrace. “I knew the two of you would make quite the match. And you were so certain otherwise.”
David raised an eyebrow at me, but I ignored it, shrugging my shoulders and returning Mrs. Mortensen’s hug. “Thank you for coming.”
Over the course of the next few minutes, both the Prestons and the aged vicar arrived, and soon the cottage was filled with the kind of cheer and noise that made it difficult to remember none of this was real. Not in the way everyone but Julia thought it was.
When the vicar asked where the ceremony should be held, Mama suggested in front of the fireplace, and suddenly, the room went quiet.
The vicar ventured past each of the guests and stood in front of the fire before he turned and looked at us, and David took my hand and led me to forward. We stopped in front of the vicar, but David did not let go of my hand.
With a warm smile, the vicar opened his prayer book and began the ceremony. I’d never been to a wedding, so I listened closely, fearful I would find myself in a state of disapproval with God, but nothing he said made me feel like I was lying. Nevertheless, I heldmy breath when the vicar asked about impediments. Would Julia see our agreement not to remain married because of her father as an impediment?
She must not have, for the cottage remained silent after the vicar’s question. David’s face was still and serious when the vicar recited David’s vows, David repeated them, his words firm. Something caught in my throat, and I blinked. Was this happening? Life had a strange way of throwing me surprises, and David was the most surprising one of all.
