“Seriously, Kev—” I start.
“Please stay there.”
“Okay.”
Haru leans in again. “He’s not going anywhere.”
I push him away. “Will you stop?”
Kevin’s voice comes through. “Stop what? Who are you talking to?”
“Nobody!Okay, bye—”
I hang up the phone and turn to Haru. “I can’t believe you did that! Now Kevin’s on his way here!”
“How else are you getting home?”
“I told you, I don’t need anyone’s help.”
“You can hardly stand straight,” he says, placing his hands on my shoulders, as if to steady me.
I push him off again. “You know what, Haru? You can’t just show up whenever you want and tell me what to do, okay? I waitedall weekfor you. I’m always waiting around for you. And you only show up when you feel like it.”
“That’s not true.”
“Then where have you been?” I press my finger to his chest. “Where were you yesterday? And the day before that? You know how much I wanted to see you.”
Haru lets out a breath and says, “If I could spend every daywith you, don’t you think I would? Maybe you shouldn’t waste all your time waiting for me.”
I can’t believe he’s saying this. Especially after disappearing on me. “I don’t have to listen to this.” I wipe a tear from my face as I turn to leave.
“Kevin told you to wait here.”
“I don’t care what he says.”
“Eric.” Haru grabs my hand. But I pull away again.
“Leave me alone!”
My voice echoes through the night air. I don’t realize how sharp my words are until I feel the burn in the back of my throat. Haru stares at me in silence. As I walk off again, a knot of guilt forms in my stomach.I shouldn’t have yelled like that.But the moment I turn around to take it back, he’s gone. The street is completely empty.
“Haru? Where did you go?”
There’s no answer. It’s only me standing out here.
“I didn’t mean that, okay?”
Nothing but silence. I look around.
“I said I’m sorry. Haru?”
I call his name for a long time. But Haru never answers. I sit on the sidewalk, hoping he comes back for me.
Seventeen
I’m half asleep when headlights appear down the road.Someone gets out of the car, approaching me. It’s Kevin’s voice that wakes me as he helps me up from the sidewalk. My legs feel like they’re falling straight through the ground. I don’t even remember the car ride, except when Kevin hands me a water bottle while the radio plays on low volume. There’s no elevator in his building. We have to walk up five whole flights of stairs. I can barely hold on to the handrail, stumbling at every step. At one point, I must have given up because Kevin lifts me up and carries me the rest of the way there.
“We’re almost there.”
