“Yes!More, please.”
This time, I feel her chuckling against my body, and I like that, too. I like everything she’s doing, and in mere moments, I feel so much more than in all the times I rutted with Girard. Soon, I feel like I’m chasing something that I thought was a myth. My hands flail, unsure of where to go, until I realize I can reach Isabeau’s head.
I twine my fingers in her hair, and somehow that encourages her to kiss me deeper. She doesn’t stop until the most unladylike noises escape my mouth. The world feels like it has been born in an explosion inside me, and I have never felt so content as in this moment.
Isabeau stares up at me with a happy smile.
“Thank you,” she says as she crawls up my body and kisses me before flopping onto my pillow and pulling me into her embrace. “Ifwewerespilling secrets, I would tell you I’ve wanted to do that since we first kissed.”
I erupt into laughter. “If I knewthatexisted before today, I’d feel the same way.”
As we recline in our silence, I feel like I’ve carved away a small space to shelter my joys and dreams. The fears are notgone, rather they all rest at the door of the room. The monster still hunts. I am still unsure of how to find or stop it. I still worry over my mother and sister, and I still worry over Isabeau’s curse. Yet as I curl into her embrace, I feel lighter.
“My father did not die of heart complaints,” I whisper. “The beast in the forest killed him, as it killed the other men.”
“What?” Isabeau stares at me as if I’ve said the most outlandish thing. If only she knew the rest of the secrets I still hold inside!
“He died while he was traveling.” The words to add that he died whilehunting the beastfeel too raw still. They would lead to other things I know not how to admit.
“So that was why you were hidden away after the vows,” she muses.
“Yes.”
In a way itistrue. I was hidden away because his death meant I became the Hunter. I know that’s not exactly what she means, but it’s close enough to the truth that I don’t feel like I’m lying to her.
“I tried to see you,” she says.
“I was indisposed,” I whisper.
“Why has the Hunter done nothing about this beast? Why has—”
“The Hunter sent soldiers to patrol,” I interrupt, perhaps too harshly. “The beastalsoattacked the Hunter.”
She stares at me, and again I think she is going to guess my secret. “I suppose your father knows the Hunter, too. My father did.” Isabeau sighs. “The queen could tell us. Our fathers could have.”
“Perhaps when our mourning ends, we will both know.” A tinge of guilt overwhelms me. I could tell her now. I should. I said I would when next I see her, but we are already sharing the edge of my secret.
Tell her,my guilt urges.
I fear that later she will judge me for not doing so, but in this precious moment, I don’t want to. I want only to enjoy this brief time we have stolen from our lives and burdens. I want to relax into this joy she has gifted me.
“The sun is dropping lower by the hour,” Isabeau says after a long silence. “Will you ride toward home tomorrow?”
“I think I could go this evening.”
Her embrace tightens. “I would prefer we ride together. Your father was attacked and killed, and I would be destroyed if I lost you so soon after having you in my arms again.”
I want to make light of her dramatic declaration, but a glance at her expression reminds me that shemeansthat fully. She’s always been more emotional than people realize. Her intensity warms me, and I agree. “In the morning, then.” I pause. “Do you want to stay here?”
She shakes her head. “I do, but I will not. Once we are properly wed, I will. Forever in your arms if you will forgive the fact that I am as if dead when the sun rests.” She laughs in that bitter way I want to erase. “The duchess says I resemble a corpse when the curse takes me.”
“I am not afraid of corpses ... as long as you don’tstinkor draw insects like one,” I tease.
She goes still before laughing. “I forgot how shocking you can be, love.”
Primly, I retort, “No insects in my bed.” When her eyes widen again, I laugh and confess, “There is something rewarding in surprising the debauched duke.”
She sits up, eyes stormy, and declares, “You know I amonly yours, Gabrielle. I will kiss or court no one else. From now until death, I belong to you and you alone.”
