When he fell silent, I squeezed his hand, offering what comfort I could. He raised my hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to my fingers, his eyes never leaving mine as the moment shifted abruptly into dangerous territory.
Oh shit. I knew that look. Knew it intimately. Just not on his face.
With his free hand, he brushed a lock of my hair behind my ear, his thumb brushing over my cheekbone. The tenderness of it all made my chest tight. Not because of desire, but because of guilt.
He had never again mentioned that kiss before I went back in time. I had half thought, half hoped, he’d just forgotten it.
Delicately, I ducked my head, breaking his hold, and disengaged my hand. He didn’t have his brother’s talent for masking his feelings. Confusion rippled across his face, followed by hurt he tried to hide, before his face carefully settled into his typical expression.
This guilt was going to eat me alive. I felt sick as I thought of how I’d just hurt him by pulling away, a hurt that would pale in comparison to the eventual betrayal he would feel when he learned I was bound to Griff. Kaia was right. We couldn’t let this go on for too much longer. Finn deserved to know.
“Does that help?” he asked, deliberately casual.
I nodded, but it didn’t. Not really. I had made everything more complicated and I still had no idea what Garrett had done or how to undo it.
And unfortunately, I knew who I needed to ask now. As much as I tried to avoid any interaction with my grandfather, he was wrapped up in Violet’s memories regarding Starfire. Maybe there was a chance he still knew something or whatever Garrett did could be reversed ifI talked to him about it. I asked Finn to accompany me, wishing yet again that my mate was here.
When we arrived at Zachariah’s study, I steeled myself. Finn took my hand and squeezed, silently telling me he was with me. I hadn’t set foot in Zachariah’s rooms since my disastrous first day in Valdris. The door was open, but he wasn’t alone. I paused in the doorway before knocking, debating the wisdom of this, but Andrei motioned me to come in, as a messenger finished up his report.
Finn and I slid into the room, easing the door closed behind us as Zachariah spared us barely a glance, all of his attention fixated on the messenger and the grim picture he was painting.
My stomach turned as the messenger spoke of coordinated attacks. The Veil itself screaming in agony, every person with strong channels able to feel it. Holes spreading faster than ever before, too many for the Veil to heal before another one was torn into the fabric of our protection. Lost contact with border towns. People gone without a sign of struggle. Refugee camps overflowing. People dying. Being turned, becoming an army of hufen.
As the messenger continued conveying the information, my hand sought Finn’s and I clung to it.
“And Griff?” I couldn’t stop myself from choking out to Andrei standing at my side.
Andrei patted my shoulder. “Every report has said he’s fine. He may just be out there for longer than we anticipated.”
I reached for that familiar warmth to reassure myself that Griff was alive when something changed. It flickered—not dimming, but shifting somehow. A spike of alarm accompanied it, sharp and sudden, before settling back to its normal glow.
My heart hammered as I pressed deeper into the connection and I felt him press back. He was alive certainly, but something had happened. Something had startled or worried him.
What the hell was happening out there?
Zachariah dismissed the messenger, who bowed and retreated from the room.
“We are pulling the army back from the border,” Zachariah said. I knew this, having seen the encampments around the castle, but stayed silent as for once he was addressing me without scorn. “They’ll regroup here and at strategic points throughout the realm. For the eventual battle that will occur should the Veil continue to deteriorate at this rate.”
I felt echoes of another conversation. History was repeating itself, fifty years later. For a moment, I was transported back to that tent with Violet, hearing her talk about the army’s movements. Yet again, there was fear in people’s voices. The knowledge that we were facing impossible odds. And the resignation that we would go to battle once again in order to fight for the survival of our way of life itself.
But Violet had clearly known something we didn’t. She’d believed in a power so strong it could turn the tide. Light to banish darkness. She had been so confident in it that she had tied her life force to it, to save her home.
I addressed my grandfather. “I need to ask you about Starfire.”
“Starfire,” Zachariah mused. “The word is… familiar.”
I blinked. I had just spent the morning entrenched in Violet’s memories, watching him drill her over and over in attempts to reach it. And the word was simplyfamiliar?
Whatever Garrett had done was not going to be undone easily.
“It’s not just familiar,” I said, throwing caution to the wind. “You’ve been searching for access to it your whole life. You tried to get Violet to access it. You pushed her toward it because you believed it was the answer to this whole mess.”
Zachariah froze. “How could you possibly know that?”
Andrei made an involuntary movement as I said, “Because I have Violet’s memories.”
“Youwhat?” Zachariah blanched.
