Boyd had tried to hold it back, but tears ran down his face. Maybe it was okay since Morgan’s face was still dry despite the raw pain in his voice. He wiped them away on the back of his hand.
“What did I tell you?” Boyd asked. “I’ll do whatever you want.”
Morgan grimaced and banged his head back against the vending machine in frustration. Then he took a deep breath, scrubbed his face roughly, and set his jaw. That brief, delicate glimpse of vulnerability was gone, walled up behind Morgan’s usual guard.
“That’s not your job,” he said. “I can take care of myself. I always have.”
He braced his hand on the ground and pushed himself up. There were bloodstains on his jeans. Boyd looked up at him.
“Yeah, but you don’t have to do it alone,” he pointed out. “I—”
“Fuck sake,” Morgan said harshly. “You do know Boyd isn’t short for boyfriend, don’t you? Because you’re not mine.”
Boyd hesitated halfway up off the ground at the old taunt. He hadn’t heard that since… since Sammy disappeared. He started to say something, but he thought better of it. They knew who Morgan was now. They didn’t need any more clues, and right now, memories of back then seemed like the last thing Morgan wanted.
“You love me too, remember?” he snapped.
“I do,” Morgan said. “But when I leave here, you won’t come with me.”
“You haven’t asked.”
“And I won’t.” Morgan took a deep breath and shook his battered knuckles. An ambulance pulled up outside and splashed faded blue-and-red light over the white walls of the station. “Look, it’s fine. I just needed to clear my head. Come on. We should go back in.”
Boyd straightened up, brushed off his jeans, and wiped his face again before he followed Morgan back inside.
EVERYONE HADa plan. Mac wanted to search through Morgan’s past. Shay wanted him to say Hill had done it. Donna, before she went back to the hospital, wanted him to move back in with her, to the room she’d kept sealed in amber since Sammy left.
None of them noticed that Morgan didn’t take part. He didn’t agree or disagree, just slouched back sullenly and let them assume what they wanted. Boyd sat next to him and didn’t reach for the hand that hung over the arm of the chair.
Mac finally ran out of plans. He exhaled, rubbed both hands over his head, and looked at Morgan.
“That sound okay to you?” he checked.
Morgan shrugged. “Does it matter?” he asked. He shrugged when Mac cocked his head to the side to give him a curious look. “Talk to who you want, Macintosh. I can’t stop you, and I don’t care anyhow. So—”
There was an awkward pause, and then Mac cleared his throat. He shuffled his papers back into the file and picked it up. “Sorry,” he said. “I forgot what a shock this must be for you. You probably need some time to wrap your head around it. We can talk again tomorrow.”
“You can,” Morgan muttered as he grabbed his—Boyd’s—hoodie from the back of his chair. “I’m going back to the B and B. If you need me, you know where I am.”
He stalked out again. This time he didn’t slam the door, and it swung gently closed behind him. Mac shifted his weight, and glass crunched in the carpet under his feet.
“Is he okay?” he asked.
“I don’t know,” Boyd said. Then he amended that to the truth. “No.”
Mac sighed. “I don’t know why I want to pretend that’s a surprise,” he said. “This—Jesus—it would screw up the most well-adjusted person. And his childhood—”
He glanced at Shay and shut up.
“I should go,” Boyd said. He’d taken the day off, but he didn’t need to admit that just now. “Shift starts soon. Just… give Morgan some space, okay?”
“As much as I can,’” Mac said. “Some questions I need answers to.”
“I don’t think he has them.”
“He doesn’t know he does,” Mac said. “Not yet. And I’ll need to speak to you again too, Boyd. Your instincts were right. The fires three days ago were arson.”
Boyd acknowledged that with a nod, although he didn’t know what help he could be. He didn’t investigate fires. He put them out. Shay awkwardly shook Mac’s hand and thanked him stiffly. He hadn’t had a good thing to say about Mac in fifteen years. After a few uncomfortable moments, they managed to slip away.
