Fuck it.
I kiss her.
It’s not gentle. It’s not cautious. It’s months of restraint snapping in half. She makes a soft, broken sound against my mouth that undoes me completely, and I pull her closer, deepening it.
Her hands slide up my back, gripping, holding. My pulse roars in my ears. Every nerve ending lights up at once. I devour her, my tongue tasting, diving deep, yet unable to get enough. Her hands race over my back, dipping under my shirt, her nails clawing at my skin and I growl into her mouth, wanting nothing more than to tear her clothes from her body and bury my cock deep inside her.
We kiss like there’s no tomorrow, like consequences don’t exist, our hands racing, reacquainting, touching with an urgency that has my brain screaming for more.
I inch back, my lips hovering, as I place my hands on her ribs, her body arching as my thumbs lightly graze her hard nipples. “Do you have any idea how hard it’s been not to do this?”
“Hard, yes,” she agrees.
“Every time I fucking see you, I think about this.” I slide a hand between her legs, gently stroke her through her pants. “Think about being inside you again.”
Her breath studders as she pushes against my hand. “Me too, but…we can’t.”
“I know.” Her hands roam my chest, then one slips between our bodies as she rubs the long length of me in my jeans. “Fuck, Maria.”
“We can’t do that either,” she assures me, humor mixed with need in her eyes.
“Right.” I chuckle, grab her waist, turn her until her back is to the counter, and grind against her. Her eyes roll back.
“The boys,” she murmurs. “I can’t be careless…reckless, not with…”
She doesn’t need to finish the sentence for me to understand that this isn’t just about wanting each other. It’s about what happens after a random hook-up with a guy who isn’t serious about a relationship, or a future with a ready-made family.
Her lips find mine and she breathes into my mouth, “But I want you, Tuck. Obviously.”
My cock throbs as I push against her, and even though she doesn’t need words to know I feel the same, I still say, “I want you too.”
Jesus, what this woman does to me. How her ex didn’t see what an incredible woman she is boggles my fucking mind. But her ex makes me think of Rowyn and how she wants to set her up with a man from her writers’ group. Goddammit the thoughts of any other man touching her like this, her touching him, makes me want to punch something.
“Do you think…if we did it one more time, it would help?”
She lets out a quiet breath. “No,” she says, and I know she’s probably right.
“You think that’s just something people lie to themselves about?”
Her fingers curl in my shirt. “Yes.” That one-word rattles around in my brain and I’m about to pull back, to end this right now until she murmurs, “But maybe…if we both know what this is and what it isn’t, it wouldn’t hurt to find out.”
“Do you need it, Maria? Do you need me?” I have no idea why I need to hear the words.
Her eyes flutter closed for a second. “Yes. I need…”
I brush her face with the back of my hand, my eyes searching her face. “You need to do something…something just for you?”
She blinks at me, like she’s surprised I knew that. “Is that selfish?”
“You give everything you have to everyone else, never making what you need a priority. I don’t think it’s selfish to want something for yourself. Even if it is, is that so wrong?”
“Everything about this is wrong, Tuck.”
“I know, but just once maybe you can put yourself first.” I grin. “Maybe it’s time you tried something different.” I lightly run my lips over hers. “Like putting yourself on top of the priority list.”
She pokes my chest, something in her shifting right before my eyes, as she says, “I’d rather be on top of you.”
6
