Kade opened his mouth to argue, his eyes flashing, but Killian plowed on. “He’s the king, for fucks sake. He could have had your head for that. You have every right not to like him, I’ve always given you space for that, but you cannot speak to him that way. And you can’t blame him for every little thing that goes wrong.”
“Porthos’ life isn’t alittle thing.”
Killian closed his eyes. “You’re right. It’s not. But Porthos is gone. And you’re still here. And I can’t lose you. So please, I’m begging you, let this go.”
Kade inhaled sharply, tears springing to his eyes. “I know Ishouldn’t have…but—I didn’t know what else to do. I just wanted to save my friend.”
“You did everything you could.”
“That doesn’t make me feel any better.”
“I know, but it’s the truth.”
“I wish it wasn’t. I hate feeling like this.”
Killian tucked a stray piece of hair behind Kade’s ear. “It will pass.”
Catching Killian wrist, Kade pressed a kiss to the palm of his hand before nuzzling deeper into the contact. “Distract me. Take me away from all this.”
“Are you sure?”
Kade nodded. “Please.”
Killian brought them together slowly. Softly. Gently. He poured everything he had into Kade, every fiber of his being, every ounce of his soul. He offered it up, and Kade devoured him whole.
Familiarity didn’t lessen the impact. Kade’s hands on his body felt holy.
The wind and the rain their only witness, Killian fucked Kade softly, taking from his body as much as he gave. Greedily swallowing down the small sounds of pleasure, savoring each and every one. He did as he promised and he whisked Kade away from all the bad.
In that moment, it was just them. Two halves of a whole.
In that moment, they were alright.
They spent two full days in bed. Only leaving to eat and bathe.
If Kade was confused about the sudden abundance of time Killian had to just lounge around, he didn’t say anything.
Killian was grateful for that, he didn’t want to talk about it.
So they spent two days wallowing. Staring out the window at the rain.
Two days before the real world came crashing back down on them.
There was something off about Killi as he shrugged into his dress uniform, he wasn’t usually so distracted. Killi loved his work, even when the burden was heavy and the nights dragged on, he took pride in his title and position. Now, he just seemed lifeless. Sad.
It was Kade’s fault, he knew it was. Everything had gone to shit for Killi after he’d arrived. Maybe it would have been better—for everyone—if he’d stayed in Turell and never come to the palace at all. Killi would still be the master of his own life and Porthos…Porthos might still be alive.
Kade hung his head, his eyes stinging. He slumped where he was, leaning on the back of the sofa, watching Killi finish getting ready.
Gods, this sucked. He was so sick of crying. Of being weak.
“None of that now,” Killi said gently, catching Kade’s chin and guiding his head up. Killi looked tired, like more than just a lack of sleep was weighing on him. “We just have to get through a few more days and everything will go back to normal.” He spoke as if he were trying to convince himself as much as Kade. “You’ll see.”
Kade melted into the kiss that Killi pressed to his lips, his hands coming up to grip Killi’s waist. He spread his thighs and Killi stepped into the space between them, closing the remaining distance.
Pulling back, Killi rested his forehead against Kade’s, their noses and lips brushing softly.
“Do we have to go?” Kade whispered. “We’re not so important that they’ll miss us. Can’t we just stay here?”
