“It’ll never happen again. I swear.”
“I’m sorry, but I’m not changing my mind,” I said, voice cracking slightly. “I… I can’t forgive you for what you’ve done. I justcan’t. And I won’t.”
Julian studied my face for a long moment, and I saw something shift in his expression. “You really mean that,” he said. Not a question. A realization.
“Yes.”
He dragged a hand through his hair, looking away for the first time since we'd entered the room. “All right,” he finally said. “I'll leave you alone.”
I blinked. “You will?”
“For the first month of training, before the Eleusinian ritual, I don't really need to be here,” he said, his voice carefully neutral. “You'll be kept very busy with your studies and Selection training anyway. The instructors will handle everything.” He looked back at me, and I was startled to see something that looked almost like hurt in his eyes. “So if you really don't want me around at all, I can give you that space. And don’tworry, I’ll still let Roman see you, so you two can discuss your investigation. I would never stand in the way of that.”
The audacity of him lookinghurtby my rejection, after everything he'd done, made anger flare hot in my chest. “You're actually upset that I don't want to marry you? The guy who terrorized me?” I asked, eyes narrowing.
“I just wish you could see past the fear to what's really between us,” he said quietly. “But I understand why you can’t, and I know it’s entirely my fault. So if space is what you need to feel happy and safe again, then that's what you'll get. I’ll always do what’s best for you.”
He moved toward the door, and suddenly I felt something twist uncomfortably in my chest. Something that wasn't entirely anger.
“Julian,” I said before I could stop myself. “Wait.”
He paused, hand on the doorknob, looking back at me with an expression I couldn't quite read.
I opened my mouth, then closed it again. What was I even going to say?Don't go?That would be insane. I wanted him gone. In fact, Ineededhim gone so I could think clearly; so I could focus on finding Cal's killer without his overwhelming presence clouding everything.
“What did you want to say, Violet?” he asked, taking a step toward me.
I took a deep breath and lifted my chin. “You always thought Roman was innocent,” I said. “So did you ever have any theories about who really killed my sister?”
He was quiet for a moment. Then he shook his head. “No. I wish I did, because then I could’ve helped my brother more,” he said. “But Calista was really nice, and as far as I could tell, everyone liked her.”
My shoulders slumped. “Right.”
“But if I had to guess, I’d say jealousy was probably a motive,” he added.
“Jealousy?” My brows rose. “What makes you say that?”
“She was a beautiful, smart girl with a great future ahead of her. So if she had a jealous ex-boyfriend somewhere, and he somehow figured out that she’d moved on with Roman… he might not have been able to accept it,” Julian said. “Some men are like that. They see a woman they’ve been with as their eternal property, even if they’ve broken up.”
“Is that how you see me?” I asked.
“I see you as mine, yes. But not as property. And I would never, ever hurt you. Even if you said you never wanted to see me again.”
“Okay,” I murmured. “Anyway, I… um… thanks. For respecting my wishes.”
Something flickered across his face then. Disappointment, maybe, or resignation. “Of course. I would never force you into anything. So if you…” He trailed off, then shook his head. “If you need me, tell one of the maids. They'll know how to reach me.”
Then he was gone, the door closing quietly behind him.
I stood there for a long moment, staring into space, feeling a confusing tangle of emotions.
Relief. Obviously. He was gone. I'd have a whole month without his intense stare, his possessive touches, his constant reminders that he considered mehis. But beneath that relief was something else. Something that felt uncomfortably like guilt. Like maybe I'd been too harsh. Like maybe I should’ve…
No.
I shook my head sharply, pushing the thought away. I'd done the right thing. Julian had stalked me, terrorized me, hunted me. The fact that he'd also protected me, killed for me, that he'd even risked his life for me… it just couldn’t erase the white-knuckled terror he’d made me feel in the past.
I couldn't let myself forget that. Couldn't let his intensity and his declarations of devotion make me lose sight of who he really was. Even if some traitorous part of me already missed him.
