“Yes, and congratulations, Your Majesty,” Stanley says.
I still can’t meet Brevan’s eyes as I nod to them, then retreat into the dimly lit room. As soon as the door closes behind me, I freeze where I’m standing waiting for the anger or sadness or pain to come.
Instead, I’m rooted to the spot, and I feel nothing.
The fire crackles. I turn to it and watch the flames dance for a long while. For a moment, they look purple, and the strange color snaps me from my stupor. I move a little closer and then chastise myself for thinking something so ridiculous.
I begin to undo the braid on my head. A woman I’d never met had braided a headband across the top and left the rest of my hair down. Something about showing off my Iskvalandian nature. I didn’t comment or ask questions. In fact, the entire time she prepared me for the wedding, I was silent as I am now.
Is that my life? My future? A shell of myself, no longer able to tell who I am. Am I Sabina? Am I Taylan? A rebel or an empress? I don’t know anymore.
I thought I was broken after my brothers died. That I had lost everything and had nothing left to live for.
I was wrong.
Because they’d have wanted me to live. Even at my worst, there was a flicker of them encouraging me to continue. It’s probably why I trudged on, even when I was reluctant.
But now.
Now I have tasted love and had it torn from me.
Every day I have to see the damage I did to the man I gave my very soul to. Death would be too kind for me. Too compassionate.
A cold breeze sends my hair into my face and has the fabric of my dress rippling. Someone left the balcony open.
I cross the room and kick off my shoes before stepping onto the cold metal. It stings my feet, reminding me I’m alive.
The kiss of the late winter cold bites at my cheeks like a soothing friend. I marvel at the stars in the sky resembling a handful of jewels and shimmering stones thrown onto smooth black velvet.
Without the moons, there are more stars everywhere like glittering dust across the night sky.
I don’t think I’ve ever looked up during Darkfall. It was always a time to be afraid. To stay indoors and wait out the darkness. But it’s not dark at all.
It’s beautiful.
So why were we hiding from it? All this time, the night sky was a gift while the moons slumbered. Yet, we were kept away from it.
Something in the back of my mind nags at me as if urging me to uncover what I’ve hidden away. Something about danger and beauty. How darkness and the things we’re told to be afraid of aren’t what they seem.
Three
Sabina
Someone moves in the darkness, and I stir, sitting up in bed. “Caiden?”
I’m still in my wedding dress since I couldn’t get out of it myself. Maybe it’s a good thing he’s returned.
“Shhh.”
A jolt of shivers travel down my arms and spine. I leap from the side of the bed and after a couple of steps, I can see him clearly. “Brevan? What are you doing here?”
“I had to see you.”
“I’m so sorry, Brevan. I didn’t want to marry him, and it didn’t mean anything to me, I swear to you?—”
His mouth is on mine, silencing my apologies. Hot tears stream down my cheeks, and I press myself against him, needing to feel his body against mine.
Large hands caress my back, pulling me tight against him. I can barely breathe, but I don’t need air, only him. I run my fingers through his hair then capture his face. I have to see himto make sure he’s really here. That he’s in my arms after all that’s happened.
