Sabina
Brevan’s gone. I don’t hear him leave, but I know he’s not in the tent with me anymore. He held me like I meant something to him. Or was I imagining that?
My arms and legs tingle painfully. Little pinpricks all along my limbs. Like they’re coming back to life after being on the brink of death. I wonder if that’s what it feels like to be brought back.
My breath hitches as the memories return. Mara. The Goddess of Death. She gifted me the magic, which wasn’t a surprise considering the fact that I could wake the dead, but why? She was clear it was intentional. That she approves of my goals. But how does that benefit a goddess? Especially when she insisted I have free will to do as I wish.
What did she mean when she said the other gods didn’t want her here? And what about Brevan and the fake prophecy. If it’s not real, how did we end up with markings that are so similar?
And did she tell me someone else was bound to all those people? To Brevan?
I focus on the pain, relishing the way it makes me forget. The way it draws me back into my body and invigorates me.
Something gnaws at the back of my mind, just out of reach. I let myself return to my thoughts, ignoring the stinging pinpricks. There was a warning or a message or a plan. What was it? A purpose, maybe?
I tense as I recall two things: the goddess would return, and I was supposed to find out what was hidden from me.
It’s ridiculous. There’s probably a million things hidden from me. How was I supposed to know what to look for? And how was I to gain access to anything important?
“Sabina?”
My heart sinks and I slowly lower the blankets enough that I can peer over them.
Caiden rushes over to me and falls to his knees by my side. He feels my forehead, then my cheeks. “Thank the gods you’re alive.”
“There’s nobody watching this performance,” I tell him.
His brow furrows. “It hurts me that you don’t think I’m capable of caring for you.”
“You aren’t. I know you aren’t.”
“Is that why you tried to end your life in the woods?” His tone reflects genuine concern.
“I wasn’t…that’s not what I was doing.” I turn away from him.
He gently laces his fingers into my hair, then turns my head so I’m looking at him. “What was it, then? Were you meeting someone?”
“No. I followed a light to a temple. It was…” I sigh. “I know it sounds crazy.” I don’t want to tell him what really happened. “It must have been a dream. I think I was sleep walking.”
He frowns. “I think this is too much for you. Women shouldn’t travel like this. I shouldn’t have exposed you to the village. To Brevan’s true brutality. You’re experiencing hysteria. My mother did from time to time.”
I open my mouth to tell him that’s not the case, then close it. Letting him think I’m imagining things, that I’m too sensitive. “I think I need to rest. When will we reach the Winter Estate?”
“We’ll be there tomorrow.”
“Good.”
He strokes my hair and I tense but try to hide it by clenching the fabric of the blankets. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here. I heard Brevan saved your life.”
“Where were you?” A little flicker of jealousy rises that’s completely surprising. I don’t care where he was.
“I had business.”
“Like your business in the tavern the other night?” I accuse.
He smirks. “Are you jealous?”
“You know I’m not.” I say it for myself as much as for him.
