“I think it’s better if it’s just me.”
“Are you sure about this?” Antonia asks.
“No, but I’m going anyway.” Before anyone else can talk me out of it, I leave my room.
I have no idea where he’d be right now or where I’m going. I walk without direction, my thoughts racing. It’s like another reminder of how poorly I judge people. Never, not ever, would I have thought that Brevan and Ludis would be working together. But I guess it’s possible I misjudged him.
How well did we know each other, anyway? He has secrets. I can’t blame him for hiding his sister, but there’s more. I know there is. And then there were the things he said to me. Right after making me believe we could figure out a way to be together. How could he confess his love, then reject me so coldly? Even after everything he’s put me through, I don’t think I could say any of that to him.
My feet take me downstairs and halls and before I realize where I’m going, I’m outside and nearly to the barn. I was just here an hour ago. Caiden and I trained all morning, then I had lunch with him in his quarters before returning to my room.
I walk a little farther, figuring that at least I can calm myself down. Get this whole Brevan thing out of my head. I should go back to my rooms, take a bath, and return to my research. There isn’t much time before I will have to figure out what I’m doing about Iskvaland.
Sounds coming from the barn draw my attention and instead of turning around, I continue.
Thwack.
Thwack.
Thwack.
It’s the familiar sound of knives hitting a target and I realize my wanderings have taken me right to him.
As soon as I step through the wide entryway, he drops the knife in his hand. It hits the dusty ground with a dull thud.
He turns, and I can see some signs of healing injuries on his face and neck. The creatures attacked him even though they came from his own sister.
“I heard about what happened. I’m sorry. How is your sister? How are you?” I ask.
“She’ll be fine. How’s Anya? They said she’s awake. Healing.” His whole body is stiff, his voice flat. He’s talking to me as if I’m a stranger.
My heart feels like it’s being compressed, like it’s at risk of being completely crushed. “Yes, she’s better. She’s going to be fine.”
“Good. That’s good.” He leans down and picks up the knife.
“Are we going to be like this forever?” I want to shake him. To force him to look at me the way he used to. I’d give almost anything for him to take me in his arms, and tell me that he’s going to fight for us.
“I’m going away for a while,” he announces.
I hate that he didn’t actually answer my question. “Where?”
“A few different towns. More relic hunting.”
My brow furrows. “Caiden’s making you do that?”
“No, it’s something I need to finish.”
“Why?”
“I just do, alright?” he says defensively.
“Alright.” I cross my arms over my chest and will myself to stand there, maintaining eye contact. This is not how things are supposed to be between us.
“I heard you’ve been training your magic,” he says.
I nod.
“Shadows? Like Caiden?”
