I walked over and picked it up. Stood there for a few seconds. Then hung it in the closet. Only after I'd done it did I realize what I was doing. Why hang it up? He wasn't coming back.
Then my phone buzzed.
Megan. I'm downstairs, let me in.
Megan Parker. My best friend. We saw each other almost every week. This woman had supernatural timing—always showed up exactly when I needed her, and also knew how to completely ignore every hint when I wanted to be alone and justplant herself right there. But tonight, honestly, I was grateful for that quality.
I buzzed her in.
She pushed through my door holding two hot chocolates and a bag of Oreos, pajamas under a down jacket. "Hey, Casey, I seriously have to vent about my boss."
She kicked off her shoes and turned to look at me. I was staring at Paul's jacket.
"Casey," she said softly. "What happened?"
I opened my mouth. Wanted to say "I'm fine."
But tears came flooding out instead. Megan dropped the shopping bag, crossed the room in two steps, and pulled me into her arms.
She didn't say anything. Just held me. When I finally ran out of breath from crying, she let go and sat me down on the bed.
"Talk," she said, pressing a hot chocolate into my hands. "From the beginning. Don't skip a single word. I need the full evidence chain."
Everything poured out—all the compromises and concessions of the past few years, every move Paul made at tonight's banquet, how he took Diana's hand onstage, that diamond ring blazing under the lights.
Megan held me, sipping her hot chocolate, saying nothing, letting me empty it all out.
When I got to what Paul said to me on the street corner, I broke down completely. Megan waited, then spoke softly.
"Casey, I'm going to ask you something. You don't have to answer now. Think about it."
"What?"
"These three years—was there ever a moment when you knew, deep down, that you'd end up here?"
I froze.
"Yes," I said. "There were moments. But I convinced myself I was overthinking it every time."
"Right," Megan said. "Every time you sensed something was wrong, you were right. You just wanted so badly for him to be the right person."
I didn't speak.
"You know what breaks my heart?" she continued. "It's not what he did tonight. It's that you worked so hard to make this relationship work, and in the end, you realized he never saw you as his equal. Not once."
"I thought he meant it," I said, voice thick. "All that talk about Hawaii, about being together—when he said those things, I thought he meant them."
"I know you meant it, Casey," Megan said. "There's no shame in that. Loving someone seriously isn't your fault. He just didn't deserve how serious you were."
"But," I said, "did I do something wrong? If I—"
"Casey," Megan put her hand on my shoulder, cutting me off. "Stop. I need you to hear this one sentence. Really hear it. You not being good enough was never why you ended up here. His world has its own rules. He never planned to let you in. Not because you weren't good enough, but because from the start he kept things in two separate drawers—you in one, his family and social circle in the other. He just never opened both drawers at the same time to show you."
I leaned against her. Silent for a moment. "So when he talked about Hawaii, he was—"
"Living a dream which he maybe believed in that exact moment," Megan said. "But he never seriously thought about how to make it real. Casey, some people are really good at saying beautiful things in certain moments. That doesn't mean they're ready to be accountable for those words."
Something tangled in my head suddenly loosened.
